Lawyers, love ‘em or hate ‘em

[missfinch]

And then the cop was an effing liar. You should have stood up and yelled that at him during the trial. I assume that would have gone over well.

I was going crazy at the defense table but my lawyer was giving me the reassuring “shhh, we got this” arm pat.

Was one of the times you were detained because you were in a fight in the parking lot after a football game and you chucked a brick at a car, and this crazy lady screamed at you in front of the cops?

Nope.

How can I trust you though? Miss Finch said you would lie.

Too funny!

Have you visited the punchable offense thread? You might have material to contribute there.

Thanks, I’ll have to remember that for my getting banned for life from the Jiffy Lube story.

[ClemmonsDevil]

Thanks, I’ll have to remember that for my getting banned for life from the Jiffy Lube story.

Wait. What?!?!

[bundabergdevil]

Thanks, I’ll have to remember that for my getting banned for life from the Jiffy Lube story.

My intrigue just got turned up to 11.

[missfinch]

Wait. What?!?!

My intrigue just got turned up to 11.

Well the circumstances weren’t as dramatic as the disorderly conduct and there were no particularly fun details, but the story descriptor is always fun to report! It was the last day of school for my 4 kids before Christmas break, with all that entails in the way of class parties, pageant costumes, teacher gifts, Secret Santas and such, our dog had been hit by a car and I needed to pick her up at the orthopedic animal hospital, and I also needed to get the oil changed in my vehicle before we left on a ski trip the next day. So I pretty much was not in the mood for any crap and ended up telling the Jiffy Lube dude that I was not his sweetheart, that I was perfectly capable of understanding the checklist on the receipt and did not need to have it read aloud and explained to me item by item (especially in the little sing-songy voice he kept waiting for me to acknowledge, although apparently not in the way that I did), and that I just wanted him to run my card so I could go. He got mad, called me a bad word, and told me not to ever come back. Ever!!

[ClemmonsDevil]

Well the circumstances weren’t as dramatic as the disorderly conduct and there were no particularly fun details, but the story descriptor is always fun to report! It was the last day of school for my 4 kids before Christmas break, with all that entails in the way of class parties, pageant costumes, teacher gifts, Secret Santas and such, our dog had been hit by a car and I needed to pick her up at the orthopedic animal hospital, and I also needed to get the oil changed in my vehicle before we left on a ski trip the next day. So I pretty much was not in the mood for any crap and ended up telling the Jiffy Lube dude that I was not his sweetheart, that I was perfectly capable of understanding the checklist on the receipt and did not need to have it read aloud and explained to me item by item (especially in the little sing-songy voice he kept waiting for me to acknowledge, although apparently not in the way that I did), and that I just wanted him to run my card so I could go. He got mad, called me a bad word, and told me not to ever come back. Ever!!

Oh boy. He talked down to you. Big mistake. I saw a car salesman do this to my wife one time. She basically unzipped him with velociraptor like claws and ate him in front of his co-workers.

[missfinch]

Oh boy. He talked down to you. Big mistake. I saw a car salesman do this to my wife one time. She basically unzipped him with velociraptor like claws and ate him in front of his co-workers.

Let’s go sister!

[ClemmonsDevil]

Let’s go sister!

Ha! It was terrible and beautiful at the same time.

[missfinch]

Ha! It was terrible and beautiful at the same time.

Yep, don’t even get me started. Lawyers got nothing on car salesmen. I just hate their horsesh**. But it never fails that when given an opportunity to explain themselves they pick stupidity over dishonesty every time.

[DukieInKansas]

Yep, don’t even get me started. Lawyers got nothing on car salesmen. I just hate their horsesh**. But it never fails that when given an opportunity to explain themselves they pick stupidity over dishonesty every time.

Yep! Told a salesman that I wanted to test drive a 5 speed Altima. His response was "Why? They don't get better gas mileage." I'm going to drop 20-30k on a car and you question the type of car I want to drive? I did not buy a car from him.

[ClemmonsDevil]

Yep! Told a salesman that I wanted to test drive a 5 speed Altima. His response was "Why? They don't get better gas mileage." I'm going to drop 20-30k on a car and you question the type of car I want to drive? I did not buy a car from him.

For houses and cars the best way to approach a purchase is to be prepared to walk away.

[jv001]

When I was a young lawyer, we used to joke that the practice of law would be great if not for opposing counsel. That sort of turned to "if not for the judge".
In recent years we discuss (usually not joking) we say that the practice of law would be great if not for the clients.

When I was a very young lawyer, I attended a seminar where a prominent lawyer from Kansas City talked about how he had lost his first 13 trials. He then went on to say that he learned, the hard way, that he had to stop trying cases the way his clients wanted him to.

I didn't get it initially but I do now. Many clients want us to be a complete butt holes in trial. They view unbridled aggression as skill That usually backfires.

Lawyers are flawed just like everyone else. Some of my best friends are lawyers. Some of my worst enemies are lawyers.

Some of my clients are great people, some are terrible people.

Depending on the source, I can get a little sensitive and irritated with lawyer jokes.

With the benefit of age - great successes and great failures - it becomes easier to have some perspective.

Forgive my rambling.

During a round of golf, after one of my golfing buddies, hit's a hooking drive. I always tell them "Some of my best friends are hookers".

[DukieInKansas]

For houses and cars the best way to approach a purchase is to be prepared to walk away.

Very true. Surprised a Toyita salesman years ago by doing that - asked to test a 5 speed Camry and he said they didn't have one. I thanked him and left. He was surprised that a female asked for a manual transmission and even more surprised when I left.

Got the price I wanted on an Altima once because another customer was there to buy a Maxima. He finished ny deal to work in a deal for a bigger commission.

[bundabergdevil]

For houses and cars the best way to approach a purchase is to be prepared to walk away.

And buffets.

[TruBlu]

Knew a girl who once purchased a new Mazda Rx7 because she fell in love with its looks. Unfortunately, it was a stick shift, which she didn’t know how to drive. The salesman gave her a brief demo and sent her on her way. She did okay until she got stopped in traffic going up a hill. She then had to call a friend to come drive her new car the rest of the way home. Eventually, she got the hang of it.

Knew another girl who bought a 280Z, and ordered personalized tags with her 3 initials and a dash ‘Z’. She thought it was the coolest car ever, because all the guys on the road honked and waved at her. I thought she did it intentionally, but had to explain to her why she got all the attention. Her tag was “SLE-Z”.

[Indoor66]

For houses and cars the best way to approach a purchase is to be prepared to walk away.

Have the "cash on the table" and be willing to pick it up. Establish the atmosphere that says: I am going to purchase a car today; the question is: Are you going to sell one?

[aimo]

Maybe we should move this convo to the punchable offense thread, but I have had some run-ins with sales guys who automatically assume that breasts equate ignorance.

One was at an auto place where I had bought my tires, so I took it there for the free rotation and balance. This A****LE took it upon himself to lecture me about waiting too long to have them rotated. I was not happy, and I was not that "late" in getting them rotated. When I was driving my car the next few days, I realized that it felt funny, like the tires were not gripping the road. So I took it back the next weekend. The same guy proceeded to tell me it was b/c I had waited too long and that was the result, that the wear on the tires was making it drive funny. Actually yelled at me some more. But he agreed to take a look. A little while later, a DIFFERENT guy comes out to tell me that I was correct. That the tires on my car had directional tread (which I knew, and suspected it was the problem) and that the guy had not rotated them properly and they were essentially on backwards. I demanded to speak with the manager and I told them everything that had happened. I (loudly) told him that he needed to train his men that they cannot assume that women do not know anything about cars. He made the sexist jerk come out and apologize to me. I did not accept the apology, I think I just yelled at him for being an a****le. It felt good.

Another time, I went to a local stereo/electronic store to purchase a CD player. The snotty sales guy asked me, "You do realize that you have to have a receiver. You can't just plug a CD player into speakers and expect it to work!" I cannot remember the exact words I used with him, but I do know that I went OFF! I think I left right then and came back later to buy it so he would not get the commission.

I fear the day when I stop using masks. I have gotten used to mouthing all kinds of things at people, and I'm worried I'll forget I'm not wearing one.

[ClemmonsDevil]

During a round of golf, after one of my golfing buddies, hit's a hooking drive. I always tell them "Some of my best friends are hookers".

Stealing this.

[ClemmonsDevil]

And buffets.

I am anti-buffet. Unless you count a salad bar. I am pro salad bar. And Wild Wing Cafe used to do a wing bar I loved. And when I used to eat carbs I loved pizza buffet. In short, I really love buffets.

[ClemmonsDevil]

Have the "cash on the table" and be willing to pick it up. Establish the atmosphere that says: I am going to purchase a car today; the question is: Are you going to sell one?

Well phrased. Agree with this.

[Ggallagher]

Have the "cash on the table" and be willing to pick it up. Establish the atmosphere that says: I am going to purchase a car today; the question is: Are you going to sell one?

This is the approach I've used for every car purchase since the first one I bought in 1976. I haven't financed a car purchase since then. But I do not let the salesperson know it will be a cash purchase up front. If they have that knowledge, then they know there's no money to be made on any kind of financing arrangement. I have read several times that there will be much less willingness to deal on options once they're aware they can't make money on the financing.