Originally Posted by
Tom B.
Re: coaching techniques -- I think it's a bit myopic to focus narrowly on yelling, cursing, challenging manhood, etc. Lots of coaches do that. But not all know how to do it effectively.
The first year I played high school basketball, we had a coach who yelled and cursed some, but not what I'd call an excessive amount. He was a bad coach, though, mainly because his attitude stunk. The best word to describe him would be petulant. He'd belittle guys, played passive-aggressive mind games, and almost never had anything positive to say. He was one of those guys who just seemed to go through life mad and resentful at the world, and took it out on the teenagers he was charged with coaching. We had a reasonably talented team, but ended up with a losing record. Two or three guys quit during the season. Team chemistry sucked. After our next-to-last game of the season (a loss, natch), two teammates got into a fight in the locker room. Just a miserable experience.
Fast forward to the next year. New coach. Definitely more of a yeller -- in fact, he told us point blank on the first day of practice that if we didn't want to get yelled at, we'd come to the wrong place. Cursed plenty. Would get in your face and challenge you. BUT...and this was key...he knew how to mix his intensity with positive reinforcement, teaching, and even humor at times. He knew how to break guys down, then build them back up (whereas our prior coach knew only how to grind people down). He knew how to push you to your limit, but leave you at the end of the day wanting to come back for more tomorrow. And to my knowledge, he never knocked food out of anyone's hands.
We had less athletic talent on that team than the year before, but our chemistry was light-years better. We gelled, our play improved, and we finished with six more wins than the previous season and a winning record. And the coach? He coached for 15 more years after I graduated, went to six state finals, won three state championships, and built a program that's now a state basketball power and sends guys to play college ball most years.
There's a real art to coaching, to knowing how to challenge and push people without crossing the line to jerkishness (the filter wouldn't let me use the word I wanted to use here) and abuse. And it's not easy. If you figure it out, you can have a long and successful career. If you don't -- and it sounds like Durkin and his gang haven't, or didn't care -- that's a recipe for toxicity and trauma.