Might need some help here

[duketaylor]

Dropped both boys off yesterday at GMU, freshmen. One boy doesn't like roommate from get-go. Not sure it's validated or not. Wife is upset; trying to start managing this from home. We are empty-nesters now and am working on a solution. Any advice is welcome. Thx!

[OldPhiKap]

Dropped both boys off yesterday at GMU, freshmen. One boy doesn't like roommate from get-go. Not sure it's validated or not. Wife is upset; trying to start managing this from home. We are empty-nesters now and am working on a solution. Any advice is welcome. Thx!

That stinks. My freshman roommate was a first class wanker.

I'd say he's gotta ride it out a bit and try to adapt. You won't always like the folks you work with, but you gotta work with 'em. Part of the growth process.

Can you be more specific on what the issue is?

[weezie]

Lol, my frosh roommate was a complete dud.

Part of the process duketaylor, calm your wife and carry on. Boys don't get as amped up as girls do in this sitch (and I don't mean to cast any gender aspersions) but I do think 'son of duketaylor' will be fine.

Sometimes they just gotta lump it out.

[devil84]

Gotta agree with Weezie and OPK here. Son of DukeTaylor will be fine (eventually). You're paying big bucks to send him off to learn, and interpersonal skills are one of those things he has to learn, and he has to do it himself.

Mrs. DukeTaylor, on the other hand, has found herself in an empty nest. It's really, really hard for many moms to know their baby is struggling. I'd suggest finding something to keep her busy over the next few days. I suggest a luxurious B&B. And when packing, forget the cell phone charger.

An alternative: tackle those home improvement projects you've been wanting to do. Take out the power tools and start talking about taking down drywall, fixing the plumbing, or replacing the flooring. She'll be so busy trying to keep you from making a mess of the house that she'll be too distracted to worry about Sons of DukeTaylor. Climbing ladders outside (particularly if you don't do this often), the threat of water being turned off for more than 8 hours, and idea of the inability to use the kitchen, bathrooms, and/or bedroom for an extended period of time is usually good to distract her from whatever else is bothering her.

[weezie]

...Climbing ladders outside (particularly if you don't do this often)...

I KNEW IT!!! A husbandly plot to drive wives into insanity. Finally I have the proof, a confession!

Excellent play devil84. I parry with a trip to the mall to make all husbands try on pants.

[OldPhiKap]

I KNEW IT!!! A husbandly plot to drive wives into insanity. Finally I have the proof, a confession!

Excellent play devil84. I parry with a trip to the mall to make all husbands try on pants.

You lost me at "trip to the mall"

[Mtn.Devil.91.92.01.10.15]

Dropped both boys off yesterday at GMU, freshmen. One boy doesn't like roommate from get-go. Not sure it's validated or not. Wife is upset; trying to start managing this from home. We are empty-nesters now and am working on a solution. Any advice is welcome. Thx!

Not getting along with your first semester roommate is a college rite of passage. He will learn more from having to find a way to get along with someone he isn't compatible with than he will in his freshman level classes.

As far as "empty-nesters" goes, I'd advise taking a trip somewhere that your kids would have found "boring" due to a lack of video games, go karts, and putt putt golf.

[Rich]

Dropped both boys off yesterday at GMU, freshmen. One boy doesn't like roommate from get-go. Not sure it's validated or not. Wife is upset; trying to start managing this from home. We are empty-nesters now and am working on a solution. Any advice is welcome. Thx!

I dropped my daughter (oldest child) at school yesterday too and my wife is having a hard time although my daughter seemed thrilled to see us go. Even though we still have my son home, I see how this adjustment may end up being harder for my wife than daughter. I think time is really the only answer, but I agree keeping her focused on other things is a good tactic.

I was in a triple my freshman year and my two roommates hit it off swimmingly and even joined the same fraternity. I did not like them very much and they didn't like me. But I made friends down the hall, hung out in their room, and studied in the library. It's amazing how little time you can spend in your own room if you put your mind to it. Kids are resourceful and I'm sure he'll work it out, but I completely understand how your wife is feeling. These things tend to be harder on the parents than the kids, I think. Plus, he'll likely spend all of his time talking to you venting and complaining, which will make you think he's constantly miserable, but in reality he's saving all his complaining just for you. In other words, it probably will seem worse to you than it really is.

[Reilly]

Dropped both boys off yesterday at GMU, freshmen. One boy doesn't like roommate from get-go ...

Are we dealing with twins here? They should do a "Parent Trap" ("Roommate Trap"?) thing and share the pain and hi-jinks.

There are enough devious minds here on DBR to provide instruction and suggestions throughout the semester. By the time we're through, the difficult roommate will be a changed man -- possibly for the better!

[elvis14]

My nephew had the same issue (terrible roommates freshman year). He stuck it out a while but eventually had to go through the housing department to get reassigned. Frankly, he stuck it out too long and it killed his first semester. He had to retake and grade replace all his classes. So, the advice to not putt out immediately is good but sometimes one really does need to move.

[BigWayne]

My oldest hit it off fabulously with her freshman roommate. By the end of the year, they couldn't stand each other.
They had moved into different circles of friends and ended up having little in common. Your boy just has a head start on finding other people to become friends with by crossing the roommate off the list early.