For the professors in DBR-land...or others wanting a chuckle

[duke74]

I am now a professor at St. John's University in NY (as I have noted in the past).

As the Fall classes have ended (and finals are over the next two weeks), I was reviewing the class "grade center" on Blackboard to generate "gentle" reminders for those students who had not turned in assignments.

Here's the response from one student:

"I am so so sorry that I submitted the Assignment 1 and mid-term paper late because I was fascinated by the 2016 American election in previous months (This is my first year in the United States and also the first time to watch the election) and I spent too much time and energy on this event."

You can't make this up. My chair told me that this was a first for her. Luckily, you would only see this once every four years, and possibly only when we have an election as fascinating as the past one.

Has anyone had "funny" excuses thrown at them? (I suspect so...)

[fuse]

Insert legend of Bonkistry here.
Among the best academic excuse stories gone wrong ever.

[Indoor66]

The dog ate it.

[BD80]

Insert legend of Bonkistry here.
Among the best academic excuse stories gone wrong ever.

Which tire?

[camion]

The dog ate it.

21st century version: The computer ate it.

[wilson]

"I wasn't sleeping; that was just a long blink."

[luburch]

My senior year of undergrad I was working on a programming assignment with a partner. We turned in assignments by pushing our files to a server. Our assignment was due at midnight and I pushed an update at about 9pm, but we weren't done. I was waiting for my partner to send me his last update so I could combine it with mine and finish. My computer crashed (hard drive just completely gave up) at about 11:35 and I wasn't able to turn in the finished assignment. Professor didn't believe me even after I showed him a receipt from the computer shop where I got my new hard drive and cloned the old one.

Sad times.

[Indoor66]

My senior year of undergrad I was working on a programming assignment with a partner. We turned in assignments by pushing our files to a server. Our assignment was due at midnight and I pushed an update at about 9pm, but we weren't done. I was waiting for my partner to send me his last update so I could combine it with mine and finish. My computer crashed (hard drive just completely gave up) at about 11:35 and I wasn't able to turn in the finished assignment. Professor didn't believe me even after I showed him a receipt from the computer shop where I got my new hard drive and cloned the old one.

Sad times.

We have all heard that one before. 😉😂😎

[budwom]

I am now a professor at St. John's University in NY (as I have noted in the past).

As the Fall classes have ended (and finals are over the next two weeks), I was reviewing the class "grade center" on Blackboard to generate "gentle" reminders for those students who had not turned in assignments.

Here's the response from one student:

"I am so so sorry that I submitted the Assignment 1 and mid-term paper late because I was fascinated by the 2016 American election in previous months (This is my first year in the United States and also the first time to watch the election) and I spent too much time and energy on this event."

You can't make this up. My chair told me that this was a first for her. Luckily, you would only see this once every four years, and possibly only when we have an election as fascinating as the past one.

Has anyone had "funny" excuses thrown at them? (I suspect so...)

from what esteemed nation did this fascinated student arrive from?

[JasonEvans]

Insert legend of Bonkistry here.
Among the best academic excuse stories gone wrong ever.

For those who do not know it... please elaborate.

[duke74]

21st century version: The computer ate it.

or..."I got a virus..."

[budwom]

i'd be happy to elaborate, except some people insist this never happened...i have no idea.

basically guys miss exam, blame flat tire for their absence, says they had flat tire on way back to Duke. Request they be given the exam.

Bonk say OK, gives the exam to them, one question only: which tire?

[BLPOG]

i'd be happy to elaborate, except some people insist this never happened...i have no idea.

basically guys miss exam, blame flat tire for their absence, says they had flat tire on way back to Duke. Request they be given the exam.

Bonk say OK, gives the exam to them, one question only: which tire?

I think it actually went a bit more like this...

A few guys went to road game, knowing an exam was coming up, but by the time they got back they were too tired to study properly. They gave the flat tire excuse.

Bonk gives them a day or two to study, then hands them the exam. The first page has one or two questions worth about five points. It was easy stuff like a stoichiometry problem.

The second page had the legendary "Which tire?" question, worth +90% of the points.

Bonk confirmed the story, saying that it was long enough ago he didn't remember the precise details, but that the story as a whole was accurate.

[DukieInKansas]

I think it actually went a bit more like this...

A few guys went to road game, knowing an exam was coming up, but by the time they got back they were too tired to study properly. They gave the flat tire excuse.

Bonk gives them a day or two to study, then hands them the exam. The first page has one or two questions worth about five points. It was easy stuff like a stoichiometry problem.

The second page had the legendary "Which tire?" question, worth +90% of the points.

Bonk confirmed the story, saying that it was long enough ago he didn't remember the precise details, but that the story as a whole was accurate.

Key to the test - the two were given the exams in different rooms. And it was pre-cell phone days so no texting.

[Bluedog]

I think it actually went a bit more like this...

A few guys went to road game, knowing an exam was coming up, but by the time they got back they were too tired to study properly. They gave the flat tire excuse.

Bonk gives them a day or two to study, then hands them the exam. The first page has one or two questions worth about five points. It was easy stuff like a stoichiometry problem.

The second page had the legendary "Which tire?" question, worth +90% of the points.

Bonk confirmed the story, saying that it was long enough ago he didn't remember the precise details, but that the story as a whole was accurate.

This is what snopes says about it; they classify it as a "legend" and quote Bonk: "I would have to classify the story as being somewhere between UL and fact. It is based on a real incident, but it has been embellished."
http://www.snopes.com/college/exam/flattire.asp

[duke74]

I think it actually went a bit more like this...

A few guys went to road game, knowing an exam was coming up, but by the time they got back they were too tired to study properly. They gave the flat tire excuse.

Bonk gives them a day or two to study, then hands them the exam. The first page has one or two questions worth about five points. It was easy stuff like a stoichiometry problem.

The second page had the legendary "Which tire?" question, worth +90% of the points.

Bonk confirmed the story, saying that it was long enough ago he didn't remember the precise details, but that the story as a whole was accurate.

A like quasi "prisoner's dilemma" for you game theory folks.

[fidel]

A like quasi "prisoner's dilemma" for you game theory folks.

I was told there would be no math.

[fuse]

For those who do not know it... please elaborate.

Someone else already answered. Duke magazine has a great article about Bonk that also references the incident.

https://dukemagazine.duke.edu/article/bonk-in-his-element

[mgtr]

The weirdest thing I came across in many years of teaching was the student who turned in a carbon copy (obviously quite a few years ago) of a paper which: Bore no relationship to the subject assigned, was obviously a carbon copy, still had another student's name on it, and still had the original class title for which it had been written, and had the submitting student's name written across the top of page 1.
As Robert Benchley wrote, I just laughed and pushed her off the stage! I still laugh at the whole thing. In the spirit, I returned the paper with a grade of D. Since the student had no passing grade on any assignment, the D didn't help him. I never saw the student again.

[budwom]

A friend of mine teaches English at Vassar, and he's told me about some very nice software used these days to detect purloined work, quite effective he tells me.