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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Location
    Atlanta, GA (Buckhead)

    This Dude is So Dead...

    I can barely do my laundry. Look at what this guy is scheming.

    It’s all clearly laid out in this six-step process. I can’t imagine what could possibly go wrong? He's doomed.

    Attachment 70

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Huntington Beach, CA

    I bet he succeeds

    In 1960, Capt. Joe Kittinger made a jump from a balloon at about 20 miles. He didn't have quite the technology that is available to Fournier, and he survived with the only complication, I think, being a hand injury caused by swelling when the pressurization of his suit malfunctioned. CRAZY stuff.
    No soup for you!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Location
    Atlanta, GA (Buckhead)

    Nah. He's dead.

    Quote Originally Posted by AtlBluRew View Post
    In 1960, Capt. Joe Kittinger made a jump from a balloon at about 20 miles. He didn't have quite the technology that is available to Fournier, and he survived with the only complication, I think, being a hand injury caused by swelling when the pressurization of his suit malfunctioned. CRAZY stuff.
    First of all, the guy in 1960 had a much better name. Take your pick:

    1. Captain Joe
    2. Captain Kitt
    3. Joe Kitt
    4. Joe Captain

    He was just cool. This guy shares the same first name with Michael Bolton. Or the same last name as George Michael.

    He's dead for sure. Besides, in the highly visual graphic that communicates the innovative turn-key approach to this daring and unique maneuver, he forgot to illustrate what happens to the balloon and the pressurized thingy at the end of it. He's already skipping details. He's dead. Daring...but dead.

    -EarlJam

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Waterloo, Ontario (unfortunately, no longer in London England).
    There has been a desire by skydivers for some time now to reach terminal velocity. Some former members (and perhaps some who are currently serving) of the SAS's Air Troop have been talking about this for a while. I would think the biggest problem would be getting a parachute that wouldn't shred at those speeds.

  5. #5
    How did Captain Kitt survive whiplash? How will Michael Bolton?

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Quote Originally Posted by colchar View Post
    There has been a desire by skydivers for some time now to reach terminal velocity. Some former members (and perhaps some who are currently serving) of the SAS's Air Troop have been talking about this for a while. I would think the biggest problem would be getting a parachute that wouldn't shred at those speeds.
    I must be missing some nuance here, but terminal velocity refers to the speed at which drag counter acts the acceleration of gravity. Every parachutist achieves terminal velocity. Well, those that survive do.

    They usually achieve terminal velocity twice in a jump: once in a horizontal body position (at about 55 m/s) - this usually is achieved after less than 10 seconds, and a second time when the chute opens, at a considerably slower speed.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Waterloo, Ontario (unfortunately, no longer in London England).
    Quote Originally Posted by gus View Post
    I must be missing some nuance here, but terminal velocity refers to the speed at which drag counter acts the acceleration of gravity. Every parachutist achieves terminal velocity. Well, those that survive do.

    They usually achieve terminal velocity twice in a jump: once in a horizontal body position (at about 55 m/s) - this usually is achieved after less than 10 seconds, and a second time when the chute opens, at a considerably slower speed.
    No, you are not missing anything. I misused the term. What I meant was that they have been takling about breaking the sound barrier for a while now.

    One of the autobiographies of a former member of the regiment is called Terminal Velocity and, since he was one of those trying to accomplish breaking the sound barrier, I just put two and two together when typing up my last post (I know nothing about skydiving as I am petrified of heights, so I just assumed that skydivers used the term in that manner).

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    Florida

    The next Darwin award winner

    I hesitate to declare him a Darwin candidate given that his is an ostensibly well-thought-out plan, but...if the space shuttle needs special tiles to prevent it from burning up on re-entry, why won't he????

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Location
    Atlanta, GA (Buckhead)
    Quote Originally Posted by KBCrazie View Post
    I hesitate to declare him a Darwin candidate given that his is an ostensibly well-thought-out plan, but...if the space shuttle needs special tiles to prevent it from burning up on re-entry, why won't he????
    If he burned up on re-entry, that would be.......AWESOME!!!

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    Acworth, GA
    Quote Originally Posted by EarlJam View Post
    If he burned up on re-entry, that would be.......AWESOME!!!
    If terminal velocity at the relevant air pressure limits his speed to 1000 MPH or so, he won't burn up, but he may get quite hot. Presumably his suit accomodates the insulation requirements?

    A good acronym for this attempt: SPLAT

    Stupid
    Parachutist
    Licks
    Arctic
    Turf

    My prediction is that he will explode on the tundra like a hefty garbage bag full of tomato juice.

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Waterloo, Ontario (unfortunately, no longer in London England).
    Quote Originally Posted by EarlJam View Post
    If he burned up on re-entry, that would be.......AWESOME!!!
    Would that make it a French* Candle as opposed to a Roman Candle**?!?



    *Original post dited because I hadn't realized this guy was French.

    **For those who do not know, Roman Candle is a term used (primarily during WW II) for a parachute that failed to open completely.
    Last edited by colchar; 08-14-2007 at 05:35 PM.

  12. #12
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Waterloo, Ontario (unfortunately, no longer in London England).
    Quote Originally Posted by Shammrog View Post
    If terminal velocity at the relevant air pressure limits his speed to 1000 MPH or so, he won't burn up, but he may get quite hot. Presumably his suit accomodates the insulation requirements?

    A good acronym for this attempt: SPLAT

    Stupid
    Parachutist
    Licks
    Arctic
    Turf

    My prediction is that he will explode on the tundra like a hefty garbage bag full of tomato juice.

    If he lands in Saskatchewan he won't hit tundra. As desolate as it is (that's a joke...sort of), it isn't tundra. He would actually hit one of the ten billion wheat fields they have out there.

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    Acworth, GA
    Quote Originally Posted by colchar View Post
    If he lands in Saskatchewan he won't hit tundra. As desolate as it is (that's a joke...sort of), it isn't tundra. He would actually hit one of the ten billion wheat fields they have out there.
    I figured as much, but was poking subtle fun at canada (good natured, but GAWD once you get more than about 100 miles north of any U.S. border, it is the sparsely populated WAAAAAYYYY NORTH.)

    I have a (distant) cousin with exactly the same first and last name as me in saskatoon. Go figure.

  14. #14
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Waterloo, Ontario (unfortunately, no longer in London England).
    Quote Originally Posted by Shammrog View Post
    I figured as much, but was poking subtle fun at canada (good natured, but GAWD once you get more than about 100 miles north of any U.S. border, it is the sparsely populated WAAAAAYYYY NORTH.)
    I wasn't sure if you were poking fun or if you were under the impression that Saskatchewan really was tundra.

    I have a (distant) cousin with exactly the same first and last name as me in saskatoon. Go figure.

    Well there is a lot of inbreeding in Saskatchewan so maybe they are keeping it in the family by recycling names too. I'm just sayin'.

  15. #15
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    Acworth, GA
    Quote Originally Posted by colchar View Post
    I wasn't sure if you were poking fun or if you were under the impression that Saskatchewan really was tundra.




    Well there is a lot of inbreeding in Saskatchewan so maybe they are keeping it in the family by recycling names too. I'm just sayin'.

    Oh, yeah. I grew up in Detroit, and my dad's side of the family all came to the "new world" via Canada. I have an uncommon last name, but (relatively speaking) there are a lot of us in Canada.

    I like Canada. Never been to Saskatchewan, only Ontario, Quebec, and BC.

  16. #16
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    New Jersey
    What are the odds he gets hit by a passing plane? That would be cool!
    Rich
    "Failure is Not a Destination"
    Coach K on the Dan Patrick Show, December 22, 2016

  17. #17
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Location
    Atlanta, GA (Buckhead)

    Hijack Alert!

    Quote Originally Posted by colchar View Post
    Well there is a lot of inbreeding in Saskatchewan so maybe they are keeping it in the family by recycling names too. I'm just sayin'.

    This thread is becoming dangerously clost to being hijacked into a "Canadian Incest" thread. Don't do it people.

    Let's get back to the topic at hand: How this nutbag is going to die in the most spectacular of ways (that's a compliment by the way).

    -EarlJam

  18. #18
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Location
    Atlanta, GA (Buckhead)
    Quote Originally Posted by Rich View Post
    What are the odds he gets hit by a passing plane? That would be cool!
    So far, we have:

    1. Death by heartattack at 142,000 feet
    2. Burn up on re-entry
    3. Splatter like a Hefty-bag full of tomato juice upon contact with ground
    4. Get hit by a passing plane

    Any other possibilities? A poll, and possibly wagering, is in the near future.

    "Surviving the fall" will not be an option. Borrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrring!

    -EarlJam

  19. #19
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    Lompoc, West Carolina

    He'll shoot himself

    Tiny Gut Elves will induce vomiting and the resulting bile will freeze and pelt his body similar to shotgun pellets.

  20. #20
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    Seattle, WA

    Wheat fields?

    I was thinking Canada = big, tall, pointy evergreen trees. Therefore, if this guy manages to avoid: hypothermia, depressurization, frozen equipment, burn up on "re-entry," not passing out from the physical stress of the fall, and not getting hit by a plane or goose or other Canadian sky impediment, it'd be pretty darned "funny" (in that sick way) if his ultimate demise was to be impaled on some lumber-to-be.

    But that won't happen in a wheat field, I guess. Darn.

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