Completely Puzzled

[captmojo]

Today, the First Mate has left home for an out of town appointment. She has left it to me to play Suzy Homemaker. One of my duties is making up the bed.

My disillusionment comes from wondering why we have thirteen, 13, yes, count'em, thirteen pillows of various sizes, shapes and colors on our sleeping platform. What is the purpose? Is it just a female thing? What function do they provide? We don't use them. They just lay there. Every night, whosoever would be first to give up on fighting sleep, has to enter the sleep chamber and remove them, where they lay stacked on floor until next morning, only to be re-placed on the bed.

Is this some idea that has been taken up by reading Martha Stewart? Bedding catalogs? Pillow catalogs? Damn advertising execs.

I've always been a guy who considers function over style so this is very frustrating to me. Anyone who has an answer, please reply. I've got to sign off now and do the dishes.:(

[snowdenscold]

Today, the First Mate has left home for an out of town appointment. She has left it to me to play Suzy Homemaker. One of my duties is making up the bed.

My disillusionment comes from wondering why we have thirteen, 13, yes, count'em, thirteen pillows of various sizes, shapes and colors on our sleeping platform. What is the purpose? Is it just a female thing? What function do they provide? We don't use them. They just lay there. Every night, whosoever would be first to give up on fighting sleep, has to enter the sleep chamber and remove them, where they lay stacked on floor until next morning, only to be re-placed on the bed.

Is this some idea that has been taken up by reading Martha Stewart? Bedding catalogs? Pillow catalogs? Damn advertising execs.

I've always been a guy who considers function over style so this is very frustrating to me. Anyone who has an answer, please reply. I've got to sign off now and do the dishes.:(
You need to get Coupling (British version obviously), season 2, episode 3 and go to the 22 minute mark and watch from there.

EDIT: Better yet - check out what I found: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cEqgxAsnQlM !

[Cavlaw]

I have forbidden my wife from adding these wasteful bits of fluff to our bed... with her permission, of course.

[Jeffrey]

My disillusionment comes from wondering why we have thirteen, 13, yes, count'em, thirteen pillows of various sizes, shapes and colors on our sleeping platform. What is the purpose? Is it just a female thing? What function do they provide?

Hi,

Each & every one of them has a purpose and is highly functional. Your lady has 13 different choices (dependent upon her desire for size, shape, and weight) to hit you with when you foolishly ask such stupid questions. No doubt what will happen to you upon her return! :D

Best regards,
Jeffrey

[Fish80]

I don't feel quite so bad now, we only have 9 pillows on our bed. I'll have to find a way to block my wife from reading that you have 13 pillows, otherwise I too will soon have 13. Or perhaps 14, she's quite competitive.

But here's where it gets fun. The placement of the pillows on the made bed must be very precise, and I have some kind of genetic defect rendering me incapable of appropriate pillow placement.

[colchar]

Is it just a female thing?

In a word, yes.

[Indoor66]

I don't feel quite so bad now, we only have 9 pillows on our bed. I'll have to find a way to block my wife from reading that you have 13 pillows, otherwise I too will soon have 13. Or perhaps 14, she's quite competitive.

But here's where it gets fun. The placement of the pillows on the made bed must be very precise, and I have some kind of genetic defect rendering me incapable of appropriate pillow placement.

Heck, I got rid of the wife an kept the pillows. :)

[TillyGalore]

Today, the First Mate has left home for an out of town appointment. She has left it to me to play Suzy Homemaker. One of my duties is making up the bed.

My disillusionment comes from wondering why we have thirteen, 13, yes, count'em, thirteen pillows of various sizes, shapes and colors on our sleeping platform. What is the purpose? Is it just a female thing? What function do they provide? We don't use them. They just lay there. Every night, whosoever would be first to give up on fighting sleep, has to enter the sleep chamber and remove them, where they lay stacked on floor until next morning, only to be re-placed on the bed.

Is this some idea that has been taken up by reading Martha Stewart? Bedding catalogs? Pillow catalogs? Damn advertising execs.

I've always been a guy who considers function over style so this is very frustrating to me. Anyone who has an answer, please reply. I've got to sign off now and do the dishes.:(

Clearly I have some work to do as I only have four plus a body pillow on the bed. And the body pillow is the only one taken off the bed at night, I do use the other four.

Am now adding pillows to my Christmas wish list.

Does it count that I have 7 on my couch?

[captmojo]

Clearly I have some work to do as I only have four plus a body pillow on the bed. And the body pillow is the only one taken off the bed at night, I do use the other four.

Am now adding pillows to my Christmas wish list.

Does it count that I have 7 on my couch?

One of ours is a body pillow. So, 12, plus the body one. They take up over half the surface area! I'm feeling better knowing I'm not alone. Perhaps a support group could be founded. (sounds redundant)

Yes. The sofa counts. You are in good company there as well.:D

[bjornolf]

Today, the First Mate has left home for an out of town appointment. She has left it to me to play Suzy Homemaker. One of my duties is making up the bed.

My disillusionment comes from wondering why we have thirteen, 13, yes, count'em, thirteen pillows of various sizes, shapes and colors on our sleeping platform. What is the purpose? Is it just a female thing? What function do they provide? We don't use them. They just lay there. Every night, whosoever would be first to give up on fighting sleep, has to enter the sleep chamber and remove them, where they lay stacked on floor until next morning, only to be re-placed on the bed.

Is this some idea that has been taken up by reading Martha Stewart? Bedding catalogs? Pillow catalogs? Damn advertising execs.

I've always been a guy who considers function over style so this is very frustrating to me. Anyone who has an answer, please reply. I've got to sign off now and do the dishes.:(

I just leave them on the floor when she's not home. Don't bother with them. Just don't tell her I told you that.

Haven't there been movies and TV shows with entire hilarious scenes devoted to the railing of men against pillows?

[TillyGalore]

Haven't there been movies and TV shows with entire hilarious scenes devoted to the railing of men against pillows?


You need to get Coupling (British version obviously), season 2, episode 3 and go to the 22 minute mark and watch from there.

EDIT: Better yet - check out what I found: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cEqgxAsnQlM !

As snowdenscold mentioned you have to check out Coupling. Not just about this issue, the program is hilarious!!!!!

[Lavabe]

Clearly I have some work to do as I only have four plus a body pillow on the bed. And the body pillow is the only one taken off the bed at night, I do use the other four.

Sorry, but WHAT is a body pillow? :o

Lavabe

[captmojo]

Sorry, but WHAT is a body pillow? :o

Lavabe

Sorry I know this. It's as long as the width of the bed. I won't elaborate further.

[hurleyfor3]

Haven't there been movies and TV shows with entire hilarious scenes devoted to the railing of men against pillows?

"Where's your other hand?"
"Between two pillows."
"Those...aren't...pillows..."

[captmojo]

"Where's your other hand?"
"Between two pillows."
"Those...aren't...pillows..."

Blue moon of Kentucky, keep on shinin'.

[Clipsfan]

As snowdenscold mentioned you have to check out Coupling. Not just about this issue, the program is hilarious!!!!!

I second/third this. Coupling is a great show, although it did tail off towards the end. I don't think that BBCA is still showing it, though, as I had it on my season pass and haven't recorded any episodes for months.

[DevilAlumna]

Is it just a female thing?

To respectfully disagree with Colchar, no, it's not a female thing.

I am the proud non-owner of zero extraneous pillows, either on our bed, guest beds, or living room seating.

Frankly, maybe it's a guy trait of mine, but I don't see the purpose either, could never get those in my parents' house to look right, and find the only time I want a pillow in the living room is when I should be going to bed anyways.

[wilson]

"Where's your other hand?"
"Between two pillows."
"Those...aren't...pillows..."

GREAT MOVIE.

"I want a f&*%ing car, right f&*%ing now."

[JBDuke]

...
Haven't there been movies and TV shows with entire hilarious scenes devoted to the railing of men against pillows?

There's a scene in 2004's "Along Came Polly" with Ben Stiller, Jennifer Aniston, and Debra Messing where Stiller and Aniston destroy a dozen or so throw pillows as part of an attempt to get Stiller's character over his pending divorce.

[merry]

To respectfully disagree with Colchar, no, it's not a female thing.

I am the proud non-owner of zero extraneous pillows, either on our bed, guest beds, or living room seating.

Frankly, maybe it's a guy trait of mine, but I don't see the purpose either, could never get those in my parents' house to look right, and find the only time I want a pillow in the living room is when I should be going to bed anyways.

Same here. And one of the first things I always do in a hotel room is find some place in a corner to stack the eight-plus extra pillows that are always all over the bed and chair.

[Lavabe]

Today, the First Mate has left home for an out of town appointment. She has left it to me to play Suzy Homemaker. One of my duties is making up the bed.

My disillusionment comes from wondering why we have thirteen, 13, yes, count'em, thirteen pillows of various sizes, shapes and colors on our sleeping platform. What is the purpose? Is it just a female thing? What function do they provide? We don't use them. They just lay there. Every night, whosoever would be first to give up on fighting sleep, has to enter the sleep chamber and remove them, where they lay stacked on floor until next morning, only to be re-placed on the bed.

Is this some idea that has been taken up by reading Martha Stewart? Bedding catalogs? Pillow catalogs? Damn advertising execs.

I've always been a guy who considers function over style so this is very frustrating to me. Anyone who has an answer, please reply. I've got to sign off now and do the dishes.:(

True story. I put my daughter to bed last night, when I ran into the pillow dilemma. THIRTEEN pillows on her bed.:eek:

No body pillow that I saw. Not sure I'd know it if I saw it.

Maybe it's like last year's 17-pt lead phenomenon in basketball, but this 13-pillow thing is freaky.
Cheers,
Lavabe

[ghost]

huh... I always thought those pillows in the hotel were for you to play body bowling.
Run as fast a you can up to the bed and slide across (cross-ways) the bed and see how many pillows you can knock off the bed...
The best part, if you slide off you'll have carried enough pillows with you that the landing will not hurt!

[cbfx3]

We have 5 ... oops i meant 6. She has an exact method of placing them to which I dare not deviate. Actually she was in NYC this weekend I for some odd reason I made the bed. I have to admit I took pleasure in simply chucking them up there however I pleased knowing there would be nobody to complain about it

[dukestheheat]

captnmojo-

dude, i'm actually ruminating on the fact that you have 13 pillows; 13 is an unlucky number and my advice to you is, now that she's away for awhile, just start throwing stuff away.

and, you can come over to my house and you can help ME start throwing stuff away; we could hide dead bodies in my garage and people would never find them it's so junky in there. seriously.

i am just like you on this one.

dth.

[dukestheheat]

ghost,

that sounds cool, the body bowling. man i'm going to try that the next time i'm in a hotel overnight. people in the next room will wonder what's going in with me, the dude, in the next room.

i can keep them guessing.

thanks for the tip.

dth.

[hamster]

i can't say much to the pillows thing.
but you guys make your beds? really?
wow .... thats discipline. I am seriously impressed.

[captmojo]

i can't say much to the pillows thing.
but you guys make your beds? really?
wow .... thats discipline. I am seriously impressed.

Not discipline.....fear and loathing.

I am seriously depressed.

Oh, 13, glad it's not 17.:eek: