PDA

View Full Version : Does your spousal unit understand your Duke obsession?



moonpie23
03-09-2011, 12:04 AM
so, i thought this would be an interesting thread. I got the idea from the "COLLEGE HOOPS DIVORCE" thread....

my wife and partner of 16 years only began to understand when we actually had a tiff about 10 years ago over a string of duke games that wound up in conflict with some vacation time.

after a long talk i told her that there was a "good vs. evil" aspect of my obsession. She tuned into the Duke "experience" for the next couple of years and after following some of the recruiting and other "histories" of the ACC (and other nationals) she told me that she finally "got it"...

now, she is not by ANY means converted, but she makes sure duke games are on the family calendar and keeps up enough to know when there is a big game.

i make deposits in the "matrimonial bank of love" in return by keeping up with women's shoes.

Dr. Tina
03-09-2011, 12:15 AM
I'm not married, but I think I would have a very difficult time being married to a man who didn't respect and understand my love for Duke. I am not sure how Duke fans can be married to UNC fans. I don't want my house divided...LOL! So, ideally, I would want a husband who loves Duke as much as I do. I could live with a spouse who loves another team (as long as it's not UNC or possibly UConn...lol) or merely likes college basketball enough to watch it with me sometimes. Actually, he may NOT want to watch it with me, depending on my mood about what's going on during the game....

:p

Grey Devil
03-09-2011, 12:42 AM
She learned early in our relationship about my obsession with Duke b-ball. I was a high school basketball coach at the time and our relationship began just before ESPN hit the airwaves (I'm an old geezer now). When we decided to get married we deliberately planned the wedding to be after my team's season was over. However, we didn't expect that Duke would be playing in the Final Four that year as they were a pretty young team (1978 -- Mike Gminski, Jim Spanarkel, Gene Banks, Bob Bender, Kenny Dennard, John Harrell, etc.) so we set the date for March 25. Turns out that one of my wife's brothers went to Kentucky and both teams won that day to advance to the championship game. Fortunately the Duke game was first and the wedding started late in the day, or nobody in the wedding party would have been at the chapel. Now, almost exactly 33 years later, she's just as fanatical a Duke fan as I am.

Grey Devil

I've posted to the board before about this, so my apologies to those who've read it multiple times already. (But hey, it was a pretty momentous day for me....Duke won! :cool: )

Billy Dat
03-09-2011, 12:49 AM
My spouse does not understand my obsesion at all and it causes quite a few problems, even after 16 years. In fact, it caused our most recent fight when I left her alone with 7 children under 9 (not all ours) including an infant, so I colud watch the UNC game in peace at a local watering hole on Saturday night. So, I had to watch us being dismantled knowing I was headed home to cold shoulders, icy stares, and a full day of huffiness. I'd do it again tomorrow. I am trying to raise the kids to be as obsessed so that it's 5 against 1.

hurley1
03-09-2011, 01:14 AM
My wife loves duke and has a broad knowledge of the game.

snowdenscold
03-09-2011, 01:20 AM
Understand? No, but she at least puts up with it mostly.

Duke: A Dynasty
03-09-2011, 01:38 AM
First off I am not married.

But I get what your saying cause nobody in my family gets it either. Every time my sissters, mom, dad, grandparents, cousins, etc... wants to do something or need me the find it annoying I put the games first. Although they finally accept defeat now and dont argue back but they still get annoyed by it.

I also just watched my first Duke game with a unc fan (my bestfriend) and lets just say I will never understand how a Duke fan and unc fan could live together. As soon as the ball tipped I was ready to commit murder because he never shut up and all he did was hate.... grrr it didnt help we lost.

LSanders
03-09-2011, 02:37 AM
We met at Duke ... Went to games together. So, obviously, there are no issues. We also have two kids that are fully indoctrinated - even when their less refined classmates give them grief. They know how to handle themselves!!

So ... all is well.

dukebballcamper90-91
03-09-2011, 05:21 AM
my wife was planning something this weekend and looked at me and my face must have said it all cause she said oh thats right the acc tourny is this weekend. And no more planning was done. She actually is on board after 12 years of my duke first attitude.

BlueHeaven
03-09-2011, 07:12 AM
My husband gets it because he is a Gator, who have had their share of sports success and a rabid baseball fan who hasn't missed a pitch in 14 years...in fact, we got married on game 1 of the World Series in 1997 when the Marlins were playing. I purposely planned an October wedding because there were, presumably, no sports events with which a pesky wedding would interfere. It turns out to have been an auspicious beginning. We have a mutual sports obsession and you either go with it, or get left behind! I think he currently owns more Duke tshirts than I do.

basket1544
03-09-2011, 07:38 AM
My husband has a wonderful love of video games so he has 3 new ones to play while I watch all my games the next month. The hardest thing is to explain to him that I truly don't want to do anything away from the house for the next month worth of weekends. He still thinks (after 8 years of marriage) that I'm going to just record the game and come with him on Spring Break trips. I do have all regular season games posted on the family calendar and he doesn't schedule anything for those nights.

4decadedukie
03-09-2011, 07:41 AM
Actually, I am blessed because Bev's "obsession" with Duke Basketball is substantially greater than mine -- and I am not exactly unconcerned or unemotional regarding this subject.

DukeFanSince1990
03-09-2011, 07:53 AM
I got married to my high school sweet heart back in 02. She was a UNC fan, had been all her life. Her WHOLE family is made up of tar heel fans. Her mom and dad are divorced and both family units are tar heel fans. But she was one of those tar heel fans who were raised to be so and told Duke was the most horrible team there ever was—oh and that coach K curses :). So when we got married and went about our lives together, her being a “tarheel fan” and me being a die-hard blue devil fan, of course we watch mainly blue devil games. She did not have a tar heel schedule on the fridge like I had a blue devil one. Well after three or four years of watching mainly Duke games (she just did not make an effort to catch tar heel games like I did to catch blue devil games) we were watching the blue devils play the heels one night and at half time she looked at me and said “I don’t know what’s happening to me, but I don’t want Duke to lose”. And that slowly began the transition of her becoming a blue devil fan. The next season she bought her first Blue Devil shirt. It was during the “down years”, you know, when Duke was “just” going to sweet sixteens, that she made the transition. Her family was shocked to say the least. How is that for cool?

DukeGirl4ever
03-09-2011, 07:53 AM
My husband doesn't get it at all. He REALLY didn't get it when I forced him to let me name our dog DUKE (he wouldn't allow Hurley), or when I begged and pleaded to name our daughter Cameron....I had to settle for Madison.

On game nights, he goes upstairs and sells stuff on eBay so at least he has another obsession to keep him occupied. He gets annoyed, though, when the dog has to hide under his legs the whole night because I'm yelling expletives at the TV.

He actually likes watching Duke, and will do so in his computer room, but he can't stand listening to me analyze everything.....out loud....to myself (which leads to fights with him because I'm too loud). That's fine with me because when he watches even a few minutes with me on the downstairs TV, we play like crap!

He does understand, though, that he should not plan anything on any weekend in March. He understood my need to take a pre-planned sick day on March 18th (scheduled lab tests), and he does entertain my daughter for two hours so I can watch the game in peace!

wilko
03-09-2011, 08:05 AM
Understand? No, but she at least puts up with it mostly.

Yeah, this is about the best way to describe it for me as well. My wife was at UNC working on her Masters when I met her. She occasionally likes to twist the knife, but knows when to stop.

At heart she is more of a Michigan girl, but not really.. Sports isnt her bag. She might watch a half of football a yr IF its Ohio State or a primo bowl game... otherwise she is uninvested.

callmecrazy
03-09-2011, 08:11 AM
It has taken some time but she is definitely on board. She writes down all the games and times in her calendar so that she does not schedule anything on game days. We are expecting our first child in May and she even agreed to name her CAMERON!!! I already have her first Duke outfit picked out for her to wear in the hospital. There are limits though...I wanted to bring her home in a Duke outfit but my wonderful wife shot that down. Oh well!!!

callmecrazy
03-09-2011, 08:13 AM
My husband doesn't get it at all. He REALLY didn't get it when I forced him to let me name our dog DUKE (he wouldn't allow Hurley), or when I begged and pleaded to name our daughter Cameron....I had to settle for Madison.

On game nights, he goes upstairs and sells stuff on eBay so at least he has another obsession to keep him occupied. He gets annoyed, though, when the dog has to hide under his legs the whole night because I'm yelling expletives at the TV.

He actually likes watching Duke, and will do so in his computer room, but he can't stand listening to me analyze everything.....out loud....to myself (which leads to fights with him because I'm too loud). That's fine with me because when he watches even a few minutes with me on the downstairs TV, we play like crap!

He does understand, though, that he should not plan anything on any weekend in March. He understood my need to take a pre-planned sick day on March 18th (scheduled lab tests), and he does entertain my daughter for two hours so I can watch the game in peace!


My wife did agree to name our daughter Cameron!!!

Matches
03-09-2011, 08:24 AM
My wife does not get it. She referred to last weekend's matchup as "just a game."

She also, about a year ago, bought my daughter a UNC sweatshirt. I considered ending the marriage. :)

moonpie23
03-09-2011, 08:26 AM
She also, about a year ago, bought my daughter a UNC sweatshirt. I considered ending the marriage. :)

this made me so sad to read... i am sorry brother....

DukeDiva
03-09-2011, 08:31 AM
We share a love for most things ACC and a hate for everything UNC (GTHC, GTH). My husband is a GT alum, his father went to VT, while his Uncle went to Duke. We became engaged during GT's run to the Championship game a few years ago.

Over the fall I had bought tickets to the CBE classic and told him that I had bought my Christmas present. He was at work bragging about the tickets and his co-workers asked him how he got his wife to agree to go to the basketball games. He said they about choked on their lunch when he explained that I bought the tickets for a gift to myself. So I would say we are about equal on our love for basketball and may even convert him if GT doesn't fire Paul Hewitt soon. It is driving him nuts!

OZZIE4DUKE
03-09-2011, 08:43 AM
Yes. She's a Duke grad, a year behind me (obviously where we met, dated, fell in love, etc.). She's not into sports, but she indulges my fanaticism for Duke and the Yankees, both in person and on TV! She is like the filters here, though. She gets mad when I drop the f-bombs... http://www.crazietalk.net/ourhouse/images/smilies/24.gif

coldriver10
03-09-2011, 08:50 AM
Oh yeah. My husband and I both graduated from Duke undergrad the same year, I stayed for med school and he went to UNC (where his hatred for UNC actually grew), we got married in the Duke Gardens, and so on. We're as hardcore as any couple I've known...which is usually great, but isn't such a good thing when we lose because we oftentimes find ourselves fighting about something mundane since we're both ticked off.

We don't have any kids yet, but I just hope that if we do, we raise them right :)

nocilla
03-09-2011, 08:50 AM
I am of the house divided party. My wife is a UNC fan. She certainly gets it and allows me to watch every game without any quarrels. She is not as avid of a fan as she used to be. (Dante Calabria graduated) But she watches a few regular season games and always watches the Duke-UNC games and the tourney games. We have fun with it though and enjoy watching Duke/UNC games together. We have 3 kids and a 4th due this month. (ages 8, 6, 3) My wife and her brother (mainly her brother who lives next door and is home during the day) got to my oldest son early while I was at work and unaware. So he is partial to UNC. My next oldest is a girl and she is an avid Duke fan because I wasn't going to let that happen again. My 3rd is also a girl and she is leaning towards Duke but still to young to really get it. The 4th is going to be a boy and I am currently trying to work a deal where I allow the youngest girl to be influenced by the dark side in exchange for me getting to recruit our 2nd boy. I'm pretty confident but will consider contacting Nate James if her brother tries to influence him.

weezie
03-09-2011, 08:51 AM
Great thread!
Mine is a Duke household, absolutely. Both Blue Devils, with a daughter Devil.
To you folks married to someone outside the clan, Hanky Panky makes some adorable ladies panties in Royal Blue, lacy, sexy, one size fits all (expensive but worth every penny) so next time your beloved starts bellyaching about your game duties, either be the spouse that purchases the panties for the wife or the wife that slips them on to model for the spouse. (I would say husband but geez, it's all good!)
We can all get along during hoops season! ;):cool:

Gugafan2005
03-09-2011, 08:53 AM
I've always been a lurker on this board, but this thread gave me a chuckle as I can relate to it.

My wife understands my Duke obsession thankfully as she is a big college basketball fan and has gone to Cameron with me many times for games. The downside? She grew up in Kentucky and you guessed it, is a UK fan. Her other team? Well, her family moved to outside of Baltimore for a long time before coming to North Carolina so sadly, she also likes the Terps.

On the bright side, a few years ago we were watching a Duke / UNC game and she looked at me and said, "you know what, I know completely understand why you hate Carolina. I hope Duke crushes them."

BlueDevilBaby
03-09-2011, 08:54 AM
I'm not married, but my dogs just don't get it. They hide upstairs during games, even if I haven't said anything yet. My mom is perhaps more fanatical than I am. My dad tolerates it until she starts dropping f-bombs (yes, my 65+ mother still drops f-bombs) or unreasonably criticizing a player (don't mention Abdalnaby in her presence). My father curtailed his obsession because my stepmother did not like how excited he would get watching games. No way on EARTH would I curtail my passion for Duke Bball for my spouse. Deal with it! (This can't be the reason I'm not married, right?):o

Channing
03-09-2011, 09:00 AM
My mom and dad didn't get it, and were pretty apalled by it (especially tenting my freshman year, which started early January and went until early March) until I took them to the ACC tourney in the Ga. Dome in 2001. They started to get it then, and when I got them tix to a game in Cameron the following year they were fully on board.

My wife (we have only been married ~ 6 months, but we met in summer 2005) didn't get it until I took her to a game in Cameron, and now she is on board.

77devil
03-09-2011, 09:01 AM
Good news: An all Duke family here including kids and dogs(see avatar). Bad news: Everyone is in a funk after a loss although the labs recover quickly.

dukebluesincebirth
03-09-2011, 09:03 AM
I'm born and raised in Durham. My dad used to carry me into Cameron when I was 4 and 5 year old when he only had one ticket and I'd sit in his lap or stand behind the section walls to watch the game. My girlfriend, who I met about 5 years ago is from NYC had never even been much of a sports fan. I explained my love for Duke bball and showed her how to do it. It didn't take much persuading. She is now a DIE HARD Dukie along with me! She came into the Duke picture right around JJ/Shelden time and fell in love (with me and Duke bball!) Now we plan on getting married and possibly naming our first child Cameron (boy or girl). I took her to the quad last year to celebrate at the bonfire and she still doesn't understand how lucky she is to have had that experience after only 5 years of following the boys!

OldPhiKap
03-09-2011, 09:06 AM
Mrs. OPK is very understanding and "knew the deal" going into it.

For that, I am very thankful.

davekay1971
03-09-2011, 09:09 AM
I am happy to answer YES! Staci is an NC State fan, but she has an obsession for college basketball and football that rivals my own. Fortunately, her loathing for UNC was so intense before we ever started dating, that she is more than happy to support Duke with me as long as I support State with her. And our marriage is well founded in a mutual hatred for all things Tarheel.

The funny thing for me is that my ex-wife is a Dukie (we met at Duke and got married right after graduation)...and she NEVER got my Duke obsession. Oh, while we were there she watched most of the games with me, but it was more something to do while she was at Duke, rather than a true, heartfelt passion for Duke hoops. I distinctly remember watching the 2001 National Championship game alone...she'd gone to bed early because she was tired.

Fast forward to the 2010 National Championship game, with Staci screaming at the TV even louder than me with ever twist and turn of the contest and jumping all over the living room when Haywood's shot bounced off the rim.

I was thrilled to finally be able to take Staci to her first game in Cameron for Kyle and Nolan's senior night. She'd been to State games as an undergrad at Reynolds (for the small non-conference games) and the RBC center, but she said afterwards that yes, Cameron was just a completely different experience. She also insisted on sticking around to hear Kyle and Nolan talk after the game.

True love in basketball obsession! :D

CrazieDUMB
03-09-2011, 09:17 AM
My girlfriend grew up in the Midwest and went to college for theater. When we first met 18 months ago her she had absolutely no knowledge or interest in any sports at all, the kind of person who literally did not know who Lebron James is. Flash forward to last Saturday, when she screamed “hit Seth! That’s his favorite spot on the floor!” Sure enough, Seth got the ball on the right wing and nailed a three. I’m a lucky guy.

mgtr
03-09-2011, 09:37 AM
Absolutely. We both grew up in the midwest where basketball is king. We have been married nearly 48 years, so we pretty much understand each other. We got interested in Duke basketball about 1990, and have followed it without fail ever since. We don all our Duke regalia and sit down in front of the large HDTV. Its great.

wilson
03-09-2011, 09:42 AM
I love this thread too. I am not married, but any woman I've ever met with any sort of romantic possibilities gets informed of my Duke obsession within about 10 minutes (even if it's July). Every girlfriend I have had in the past decade-plus understands that, with regard to scheduling time together during the season, there are two choices:
1. You may watch the Duke game with me, and you will root for Duke.
2. I will see you tomorrow.

Awareness of my Duke obsession extends even beyond romantic relationships. Monday night, I was at a committee meeting at church, and we were trying to schedule a planning session. The pervasive number 1 choice was to do it this coming Sunday after church. I winced audibly, and more than one person said, "Oh...basketball, right?" I responded, "Well, I hope so."
My entire family is Duke-obsessed. I watch a lot of the games with my mother or father (he was T '70). The first things I remember watching on television in my life are Duke games. Everyone who knows our family understands that this is just part of the deal with us. Mom and I are this way about the Braves too.

Oh, and our dogs also hide during big games.

lmb
03-09-2011, 09:43 AM
He does now. He was raised in a family that didn't pay any attention to sports. He gradually became a fan to the point of matching my intensity 4 or 5 years ago. He was the one yelling at the t.v. Saturday night - not me.

We've been to 3 games in Cameron using the McGrupp method. We tried last year and didn't get in. We're hoping to try again during a Christmas break game and bring our two sons as well. Go Duke!

DukeGirl4ever
03-09-2011, 09:43 AM
My wife did agree to name our daughter Cameron!!!

I hope you realize, I am totally jealous of this...

thenameisbond
03-09-2011, 09:47 AM
Mrs. Bond was well aware of my Duke obsession before we married. She has always grudgingly accepted it and is tolerant when I am able to indulge it with pilgrimages to Durham or other venues for games. Our three Bondlings were trained from infancy to give me a wide berth while games are being televized in Casa del Bond.

wilson
03-09-2011, 09:48 AM
My wife did agree to name our daughter Cameron!!!You'll really know you've got it good when she agrees to name the next child "Defense".

Azdukefan
03-09-2011, 09:50 AM
My wife supports my obsession to the level that our first child is named; Turner Duke and our second child (on the way) will be named Reese K (just the letter it isn't short for a name).

I have a game room that is about 800 square feet and is wall to wall Duke.

For my 30th birthday, I went to 82-50.

My in laws bought my entire trip to the 2004 Final Four for my 24th birthday.

Anyone that knows me, knows (and has to accept) my life is family, religion, country, and Duke basketball.

My best friend from grade school (and still my best friend) has agreed to go back to the room to watch Duke games while we are in Vegas for March Madness because he knows I prefer to watch the games in solitary.

airowe
03-09-2011, 09:53 AM
My wife gets it. I made sure of that by writing it into my vows that she would love me and my love for Duke just as Coach Mike Krzyzewski will be the all-time winningest head coach in college basketball forever following this season.


She now makes a "Blue Devil Dip" on the one thing I got for myself on our wedding registry (a Duke chip and dip platter) and has a lucky Duke sweatshirt (that for some reason couldn't be found Saturday.)

The next step is getting her to work in season tickets to the budget...

PADukeMom
03-09-2011, 10:04 AM
No spouse to deal with however I do have 2 sons. My oldest is the reason I love Duke. I just remember this little boy crying his eyes out after the 1990 loss to UNLV & I was hooked. I used to follow college hoops but not at this level until that night. I don't make plans to go anywhere if there is a game. I take full responsibility for Kyrie's injury because I had planned a trip to NYC before I made the schedule. My fault I wasn't there & I beg forgiveness. My son & I can not watch a game together at all. Seeing each other on game day is an "iffy" thing. We constantly text & call each other during the game.

My younest son does NOT get this at all. I think this child was somehow switched at the hospital because there is no way any child of mine could not love sports. This child is an F1 fan, I don't get it but I watch races with him however he did get me hooked on Top Gear...the BBC version.

If I ever decide to date again....Carolina fans need not apply.

-jk
03-09-2011, 10:06 AM
Mine gets it - and shares it. I met her at a Duke game in the Meadowlands, introduced by mutual (and likewise obsessed) friends. Before we were engaged, her father was beginning to think she would never find anyone who understood and could relate to her obsession.

The topper: we left our reception to a rousing "Awwwww See Ya!" from our (obsessed) guests.

-jk

BlueDevilBaby
03-09-2011, 10:09 AM
She now makes a "Blue Devil Dip" on the one thing I got for myself on our wedding registry (a Duke chip and dip platter) and has a lucky Duke sweatshirt (that for some reason couldn't be found Saturday.)

So it's all your fault. Make sure you find that thing by Friday!;)

jv001
03-09-2011, 10:28 AM
My wife and I will have been married 17 years this May. She has never been a big sports fan but she learned quickly about my love for Duke. Over the years she has gone from someone that puts up with my obsession to being a Duke fan herself. Last week she said " I hope Duke beats unc by 50 points". It took her a while to learn how most unc fans are. Even our good unc friends are obnoxious when it comes to Duke vs. unc. She won't be rooting for the ugly light blue anytime soon. Go Duke!

oldnavy
03-09-2011, 10:31 AM
OH heck yea my wife gets it. She is a Carolina nut and so is my most annoying 18 year old know-it-all son!! I am out numbered in my own house!

We have only watched maybe two games in the same room in the 30 years we have been together. One was when we were in moving overseas on to a new duty assignment, and that ended in a big fight with me sleeping on the pull out in the hotel room. The other was early on in our dating period, and she was not nearly as into it as I was so no fight broke out (thank goodness because it may have ended there).

We still fight or argue almost daily during the season. With the addition of my knuckle head son (who is just like me btw ;)) someone is always making comments about the other team or Coach K or Roy.... it never stops. For instance, the latest is my son was moaning about how many home games Duke played this year.... (yes he reads IC).

I have to tell you though, I wouldn't have it any other way. It is fun and it gives us a common interest that actually helps grow us closer believe it or not.

My son wants to go to UNC and become a Sports Medicine physician. The thought of me sending more money to that school almost makes me physically sick, but hey... the things you do for the ones you love!!

-bdbd
03-09-2011, 10:34 AM
No spouse to deal with however I do have 2 sons. .....If I ever decide to date again....Carolina fans need not apply.

Oddly, I dated and was engaged to a Carolina grad/fan for years. We did have to sometimes watch Duke-Kerlina games separately. It was fine b/c we both had a sense of humor about it; but her family, who were otherwise sane, unfortunately were over-the-top Rams club members and so we generally just avoided the topic (other than the occasional "I hate that man" (Coach K) comments from her very sweet, elderly mother...). :rolleyes:

'worked out great in the end as I married a non-sports-loving gal from upstate NY who just tollerates my BB obsession -- doesn't "get it," but is ok with it as long as she gets to go shopping while I watch... At least she has permitted me to turn our two young daughters, 7 & 8, into raving Duke BB fans complete with pom-poms! :D

TonyWR
03-09-2011, 10:36 AM
My wife does not get it. She referred to last weekend's matchup as "just a game."

She also, about a year ago, bought my daughter a UNC sweatshirt. I considered ending the marriage. :)

My son is named Cameron and the day he was born he had a baby cap on with the big Duke D on it. He, myself and his mother are all Dukies. Her side is all tar hole fans but I've made it perfectly clear. If they ever, and I mean ever buy him anything with that goat mascot or foot logo on it then well lets just say I have plans for it. You never know when you'll run out of toilet tissue!

Go Duke!

sagegrouse
03-09-2011, 10:51 AM
My spousal unit had no real rooting interest and certainly not college hoops. But she adjusted well to the Duke frenzy in the household.

She willing attended a few games a year, although the Wash Duke was as much a draw as the games. (When I went alone, I stayed at the Cricket Inn or drove back to DC after the game.) And I think it is only fair to say that her two favorite moments were "Speedo Guy" (who was right in front of us) and the "Blue Streak."

The Final Fours have been popular events with her, but then Ms. SG is a very good tourist. I, however, despite the good karma of Minneapolis, would just as soon not play there because there is still ice on the Mississippi on the first of April.

As to televised games, she is very good about watching the second half.

All in all, she has been very supportive of the Devils.

sagegrouse

epoulsen
03-09-2011, 10:56 AM
I'd say my wife gets it. She actually had the great idea to buy a bunch of cheap plates from Walmart that were on sale so at halftime for games like Saturday I could just go smash them in the trashcan rather than smash the remote or my phone (the acceptance that something must be smashed was a hard thing for her to accept though).

Alot of our fondest memories include Duke:

-Watching Duke win the ACC Tourney on our honeymoon
-Watching Duke win the ACC Tourney in person on our anniversary
-Taking my son to meet Coach K
-Agreeing to a purchase price for our home via text message at a Duke game (I actually paid a little more than I was willing just to get my realtor to shut up)
-One of our first dates was watching UNC get "Duhon-ed" (which is now a bed time story for my son)

As I mentioned, we just bought a house and I was allowed a Duke Room. I have tons of framed panoramic pics from different games I've been to with their respective tickets in the frame, as well as my prized possession: a framed personalized autographed picture from Coach K. When my inlaws were helping us move my mother inlaw and aunt in law decided they would decorate the Duke Room for me while I was at work. When my wife saw what they did she nearly had a heart attack and made them take everything down.... they placed the Coach K photo BELOW two other photos. Coach K is placed below no one! I'd say she gets it, after all, when asked if she'd rather go to the Duke Temple game or Ruth's Chris she picked Duke Temple, her reasoning? In ten years we'll remember Duke vs Temple, but we won't remember a steak.

gcashwell
03-09-2011, 11:03 AM
Mrs. Cashwell is very understanding. She only watches the "big" games with me. She goes to watch Glee in the bedroom while Duke plays Elon. My only promise to her has been to not neglect the kids during game time. If my two year old wants to play during the game, we will play. I earned major brownie points when I changed a diaper halfway through the second half of the 2010 championship game.

The only problem we really have is that I am a silent sports watcher. She likes to fuss at the TV and that gets on my nerves. I don't understand why she doesn't know that Coach K can't hear her.

jipops
03-09-2011, 11:19 AM
I got married to my high school sweet heart back in 02. She was a UNC fan, had been all her life. Her WHOLE family is made up of tar heel fans. Her mom and dad are divorced and both family units are tar heel fans. But she was one of those tar heel fans who were raised to be so and told Duke was the most horrible team there ever was—oh and that coach K curses :). So when we got married and went about our lives together, her being a “tarheel fan” and me being a die-hard blue devil fan, of course we watch mainly blue devil games. She did not have a tar heel schedule on the fridge like I had a blue devil one. Well after three or four years of watching mainly Duke games (she just did not make an effort to catch tar heel games like I did to catch blue devil games) we were watching the blue devils play the heels one night and at half time she looked at me and said “I don’t know what’s happening to me, but I don’t want Duke to lose”. And that slowly began the transition of her becoming a blue devil fan. The next season she bought her first Blue Devil shirt. It was during the “down years”, you know, when Duke was “just” going to sweet sixteens, that she made the transition. Her family was shocked to say the least. How is that for cool?

I call this a very positive contribution to society.

moonpie23
03-09-2011, 11:22 AM
my wife makes sure i get the "big tv" to watch all the games on while the she and the kids take to the bedroom tvs.....she watches cooking shows and then pops in during breaks to check the score and refill my drink.. :) afterwards, she exhibits the correct fist pump and "hell yeah !" for the wins and the appropriate, "oh baby, i'm sorry" and "they'll play better next time" for the losses.....

she's a jem !!!!

hsheffield
03-09-2011, 11:45 AM
*spousal unit #1:
never watched a Duke game with me. after 10 yrs of attempted conversion, he had to go

*spousal unit #2:
had never watched basketball in his life. didn't know how many points you got for a field goal or a free throw.

*how I knew I was going to marry him:
when after ONE MONTH of dating, he calls me and says "Newton wasn't blocking out worth a damn"

so we're living happily ever after with our German pointer named Duke and our horses, Wojo and Redick

ValleyForgeDevil
03-09-2011, 11:49 AM
Fortunately, my husband and I met at Duke and are equally obsessed and put everything else aside to watch every game. Two of our three children share our passion (the middle one, while at least not rooting against Duke, likes to define herself by being the non-Dukie). Favorite moments as a Duke family? Being at the National Championship game in 2001, seeing Duke win, and having our daughter on the floor as a cheerleader. Equally great--last year we all got to Indianapolis to that incredible Final Four, including my 86-year-old mother. We're not sure, but we think she might have been the oldest Duke grad there (Women's College, 1946), and she was jumping up and down with the rest of us! We compare notes with our son after every game (unless we lose, which puts everyone into a deep depression). Here's hoping for more great memories!

oldnavy
03-09-2011, 12:03 PM
Being in the Navy for 20+ years we met a lot of folks from all over the country and world. With my wife being a UNC die hard and me a Dukie, our friends would often ask us about watching the games. What I found funny is how they would sometimes invite themselves over or invite us over to watch the Duke/UNC game. We would always politely decline because as most of you know, the game is not a social event, it is serious business that demands complete and total concentration. No time for trivial conversation, etc...

One time when living in Bethesda MD, a good friend of mine said he was coming over from next door to watch the game. I told him that I did not entertain during DUKE games, but he showed up anyway. He knocked on the door after the game started and I made him wait until the first TV time out. Then I didn't speak to him until half time. The look on his face was priceless. He told me that he had no idea that I was that "crazy" about the game. My wife came down from upstairs during half, and we did not even look at each other. She said hello to Larry, then went back up for the second half. Larry sat on the couch and would ask questions or try to engage me in discussion, but I didn't even hear him. After the game, he thought that both my wife and I were completly nuts, but we all had a good laugh. He was totally unprepared for the level of importance we put on the game.... I guess we are a little crazy when it comes to Duke/UNC basketball...

OZZIE4DUKE
03-09-2011, 12:09 PM
Being in the Navy for 20+ years we met a lot of folks from all over the country and world. With my wife being a UNC die hard and me a Dukie, our friends would often ask us about watching the games. What I found funny is how they would sometimes invite themselves over or invite us over to watch the Duke/UNC game. We would always politely decline because as most of you know, the game is not a social event, it is serious business that demands complete and total concentration. No time for trivial conversation, etc...

One time when living in Bethesda MD, a good friend of mine said he was coming over from next door to watch the game. I told him that I did not entertain during DUKE games, but he showed up anyway. He knocked on the door after the game started and I made him wait until the first TV time out. Then I didn't speak to him until half time. The look on his face was priceless. He told me that he had no idea that I was that "crazy" about the game. My wife came down from upstairs during half, and we did not even look at each other. She said hello to Larry, then went back up for the second half. Larry sat on the couch and would ask questions or try to engage me in discussion, but I didn't even hear him. After the game, he thought that both my wife and I were completly nuts, but we all had a good laugh. He was totally unprepared for the level of importance we put on the game.... I guess we are a little crazy when it comes to Duke/UNC basketball...
You seem completely rational to me. It's your friend that is nuts for intruding!:cool:

DallasDevil
03-09-2011, 12:31 PM
Before we met, my wife had never been much of a sports fan. It didn't take her long to learn about my obsession. We dated while attending different universities a few hours apart, and the rules were clear: between November and March I generally couldn't talk Wednesday nights until late, and when we got to see each other on the weekends, at least one date was going to be watching a game. She was a good sport and asked a lot of questions to gain a better understanding of the sport. I knew she was hooked a couple of years after we were married when I flew out to Duke for an admitted students weekend at the law school in March of 2006. The first night I was there Duke lost to LSU in the Sweet 16, and when I called her after the game she was in tears because she felt so bad for Redick and Williams. She became fully immersed while we were at Duke, joining me in Cameron for open practices, spending a night with me tenting before the Carolina game, allowing me to spend what little extra cash we had for tickets, etc. She now misses being away as much as I do, and allowed our two family vacations last year to be road trips to Houston in March and Kansas City in November. Now when I come home from work on game days, she and the two boys are decked out in blue, and she always check Duke's schedule before committing to any other activity.

gw67
03-09-2011, 12:39 PM
My wife and I used to attend many a Maryland game in the 70's so she understands that I enjoy college basketball. During the early years of our marriage, I missed several tournament and regular season games because of eating out, concerts, movies, and visiting with friends. I was often quizzed "Why didn't I tell her the game on TV was important to me" when I rushed home to catch the end of a game. I stated my druthers and, as a result, for the past 20 years or so, my wife has arranged our social schedule around the ACCT and NCAAT. Except for a wedding and a few Bar/Bat Mitzvahs, we have maneuvered so I can watch the games I wanted to watch. I have also agreed to take the misses to the beach for several of the weekends during the tournaments. That suits me as well because I love the beach.

gw67

The Gordog
03-09-2011, 12:41 PM
Lucky for me, my wife (who was not really a basketball fan when we met) has adopted Duke as her #1 team. She had dated a Duke guy for a few months a couple of years before she met me, so she knew the deal coming in. She's a Cincinnati girl so she likes the Reds, went to Wesleyan undergrad and BC Law so we root for BC when they're not playing Duke. I go out with my friends for most weeknight games, since our kids go to bed at 8, but now that they are interested we watch the weekend games together as a family. Love of the players and coaches is universal in my house and we enjoy discussing important questions such as who was better Johnny Dawkins or Jason Williams.

PADukeMom
03-09-2011, 12:49 PM
Oddly, I dated and was engaged to a Carolina grad/fan for years. We did have to sometimes watch Duke-Kerlina games separately. It was fine b/c we both had a sense of humor about it; but her family, who were otherwise sane, unfortunately were over-the-top Rams club members and so we generally just avoided the topic (other than the occasional "I hate that man" (Coach K) comments from her very sweet, elderly mother...). :rolleyes:

'worked out great in the end as I married a non-sports-loving gal from upstate NY who just tollerates my BB obsession -- doesn't "get it," but is ok with it as long as she gets to go shopping while I watch... At least she has permitted me to turn our two young daughters, 7 & 8, into raving Duke BB fans complete with pom-poms! :D

I named a cat Battier. Remotes & phones tend to get flung around the house alot & I would not want to injure an innocent Carolina fan...would I?
The store where my youngest son works, his immdeiate manager is a UNC fan & wears his hat all the time so I told the store manager that as a loyal Duke fan I found that hat offensive. Seems the store manager is also a member of the dark side so I informed him I would lodge a complaint with the owner(I was joking).
I have gotten busted about Saturday night. Hey I gave UNC my respect for their win & just said I would rather March 5th be my last loss of the season then go into the tournament knowing the odds are you will lose again.

devil84
03-09-2011, 01:19 PM
I met my spouse in Ohio, where I had moved after graduating from Duke. Not a lot of Duke news up there when I moved in '84 in the early days of ESPN, no Internet, and Duke in the down years. This caused me to set aside my obsession for a while. It was during this time we met and married.

My love of Duke was well-known, but the rise of Duke Basketball intensified it. Duke obsession, with its corollary, a dislike of UNC, wasn't well understood by my spouse or in-laws (though, honestly, in the midst of Ohio St-Michigan and Bengals-Browns rivalries, they don't understand Duke-UNC?!). We met my parents at a number of away games, though, and they showered our children with all things Duke.

We moved to the Triangle 11 years ago. My obsession looks a little more normal now! Our children are HUGE Duke fans even though they attend WFU and NCSU (I really wish they'd support their teams in addition to Duke), even coming back to go to Duke games with me and their Grandma (who has had tickets in Cameron for 35 years).

Encouraged by co-workers who will also be attending, my spouse said the words I've been waiting to hear during our 22 years of marriage: "I'd like for us to go to the ACC Tournament." So, I'll finally be in my element, one of the "normal" ones -- and maybe, just maybe, I'll be a little more "understood" by Sunday night. And I'll make sure said spouse is very, very happy with the decision to go! I do hope it will kindle an even greater interest in Duke Basketball. (Many thanks to the co-workers, who are dual Duke and State fans who sparked this interest!)

It's been a long road, but we are clear that cheering for the pasty blue -- ever -- is grounds for divorce, as is asking to change the channel if Duke Basketball is on. My obsession is tolerated, but it's well known that if I'm allowed my obsession, I'm a much better person to be around.

Indoor66
03-09-2011, 01:37 PM
I got rid of all mine so it is no longer an issue!

devildeac
03-09-2011, 01:53 PM
I got rid of all mine so it is no longer an issue!

Your spousal unit/s or your obsession/s? Or both:p.

weezie
03-09-2011, 01:56 PM
I got rid of all mine so it is no longer an issue!

You're never too late to look again! :)
(See my posting on the 2nd page re: underclothing :o )

Indoor66
03-09-2011, 01:58 PM
Your spousal unit/s or your obsession/s? Or both:p.

Clearly, spouses - LOL. I love my obsessions too much.

ArnieMc
03-09-2011, 02:35 PM
If I ever decide to date again....Carolina fans need not apply.

When I was on eHarmony, I got a response from a unc fan who suggested that we should get together and talk basketball. I responded that I don't date outside my species.

I finally found the right one through eHarmony. She was born and raised in Durham, is named Sarah after Sarah P. Duke, and used to play Rummy with Big Eddie Cameron when she was a little girl. We've been happily married for 10 months. She's become a Duke Basketball fanatic and an all around sports fan.

A funny moment: we were "making out" on the couch during a Duke blow out when I pointed out that she was mooning Coach K. She said that she would apologize the next time she saw Mike. Games have been strictly business since then.

gcashwell
03-09-2011, 02:36 PM
When I was on eHarmony, I got a response from a unc fan who suggested that we should get together and talk basketball. I responded that I don't date outside my species.

I finally found the right one through eHarmony. She was born and raised in Durham, is named Sarah after Sarah P. Duke, and used to play Rummy with Big Eddie Cameron when she was a little girl. We've been happily married for 10 months. She's become a Duke Basketball fanatic and an all around sports fan.

A funny moment: we were "making out" on the couch during a Duke blow out when I pointed out that she was mooning Coach K. She said that she would apologize the next time she saw Mike. Games have been strictly business since then.

I am too young to have read this post.

ArnieMc
03-09-2011, 02:53 PM
I am too young to have read this post.Oops, sorry. I hope you're not one of our dozen grandchildren.

davekay1971
03-09-2011, 03:45 PM
You're never too late to look again! :)
(See my posting on the 2nd page re: underclothing :o )

The underclothing is a good thing, though I'm OK when Staci rocks the NC State unmentionables, lol.

Also wanted to brag on my wife's creativity with t-shirts related to our mutual basketball obsession. She's made the following gems for me:

Duke blue shirt with white lettering, on the front: "Carolina sucks", on the back: "But Hansbrough..." (except the shirt, which is not subject to DBR mods, spells it out).

Duke blue shirt with white lettering, on the front: "I'm too smart to go to Carolina", on the back: "Go Duke!"

For our daughter Christina we've got "I'm too pretty to go to Carolina" with "Go State" on the back.

For Staci, we've got "I'm too hot to go to Carolina" with "Go State" on the back, and one with "Wolfpack Nation" on the front and "We support Butch, too" on the back (made after State beat Butch for the fourth straight time this year).

But when we went to the Duke-Clemson game last weekend, she was wearing a nice Duke National Championship t-shirt...she put all that NC State fandom aside to support her absolute favorite college basketball player...Mr. Kyle Singler.

Too much fun! :cool:

drdoctormd
03-09-2011, 04:13 PM
I grew up in the 70's/80's as a Duke fan while my dad was commuting to grad school there. Since then I've emerged as the fanatic in the family--they wouldn't be around me during games. I didn't matriculate there, however, and most of my college friends were unc fans.

I'm 100% sure God sent my wife to me in med school--she's an '89 Duke Engineering grad. There is no way anyone else could live with me. She *kind* of understands--but mostly she tolerates me. She hasn't really watched a full game in years. She knows pretty much the years she was there, but not really a sense of what went on before or after.

She's resigned to the fact that I live around the Duke schedule and pays attention to the Final Four on the calendar, just in case (I've been to 5--four Duke was in).

All that being said, I've only been to 2 games at Cameron, most recently the Ga Tech game this year--bleacher seats! Better, she let me take our 6-year old daughter, who I'm trying hard to indoctrinate. Pics and vids from our trip of a lifetime here (http://www.flickr.com/photos/44905179@N00).

gwlaw99
03-09-2011, 04:31 PM
My wife had never watched team sports her entire life before we were married. A few years ago she walked into the room as I was watching a very close Duke/Maryland game. MD was up by five and she yells out "Go Terps!" (she went to MD for 1 year before transferring). After succeeding in holding in my anger, I realized that she needed to be brought into the fold. Now she loves Duke basketball, knows all the Duke players, watches as many games with me as she can, and yells at the refs.

Dr. Tina
03-09-2011, 07:09 PM
When I was on eHarmony, I got a response from a unc fan who suggested that we should get together and talk basketball. I responded that I don't date outside my species.

I finally found the right one through eHarmony. She was born and raised in Durham, is named Sarah after Sarah P. Duke, and used to play Rummy with Big Eddie Cameron when she was a little girl. We've been happily married for 10 months. She's become a Duke Basketball fanatic and an all around sports fan.

A funny moment: we were "making out" on the couch during a Duke blow out when I pointed out that she was mooning Coach K. She said that she would apologize the next time she saw Mike. Games have been strictly business since then.

If you don't mind, I'm totally going to use this line if and when I need to! I couldn't agree more!

Dr. Tina
03-09-2011, 07:30 PM
I also just watched my first Duke game with a unc fan (my bestfriend) and lets just say I will never understand how a Duke fan and unc fan could live together. As soon as the ball tipped I was ready to commit murder because he never shut up and all he did was hate.... grrr it didnt help we lost.

That's exactly how I feel. When I went to Greensboro for Rounds 1 and 2 of the NCAA Tournament, both Duke and UNC were playing there. I saw many Duke and UNC fans married to each other or related. It all just feels so dirty to me! I won't stand for having my house divided.




I got married to my high school sweet heart back in 02. She was a UNC fan, had been all her life. Her WHOLE family is made up of tar heel fans. Her mom and dad are divorced and both family units are tar heel fans. But she was one of those tar heel fans who were raised to be so and told Duke was the most horrible team there ever was—oh and that coach K curses :). So when we got married and went about our lives together, her being a “tarheel fan” and me being a die-hard blue devil fan, of course we watch mainly blue devil games. She did not have a tar heel schedule on the fridge like I had a blue devil one. Well after three or four years of watching mainly Duke games (she just did not make an effort to catch tar heel games like I did to catch blue devil games) we were watching the blue devils play the heels one night and at half time she looked at me and said “I don’t know what’s happening to me, but I don’t want Duke to lose”. And that slowly began the transition of her becoming a blue devil fan. The next season she bought her first Blue Devil shirt. It was during the “down years”, you know, when Duke was “just” going to sweet sixteens, that she made the transition. Her family was shocked to say the least. How is that for cool?

I am SO PROUD of you! This is an amazing story. You could use this as a way to help recovering Tarhololics who need a 12 step program to break their unsavory dependency on that pukey baby blue uniform!


My wife does not get it. She referred to last weekend's matchup as "just a game."

She also, about a year ago, bought my daughter a UNC sweatshirt. I considered ending the marriage. :)

Counseling definitely should be considered. If that isn't passive-aggressive, then I don't know what is...


I am of the house divided party. My wife is a UNC fan. She certainly gets it and allows me to watch every game without any quarrels. She is not as avid of a fan as she used to be.(Dante Calabria graduated)But she watches a few regular season games and always watches the Duke-UNC games and the tourney games. We have fun with it though and enjoy watching Duke/UNC games together. We have 3 kids and a 4th due this month. (ages 8, 6, 3) My wife and her brother (mainly her brother who lives next door and is home during the day) got to my oldest son early while I was at work and unaware. So he is partial to UNC. My next oldest is a girl and she is an avid Duke fan because I wasn't going to let that happen again. My 3rd is also a girl and she is leaning towards Duke but still to young to really get it. The 4th is going to be a boy and I am currently trying to work a deal where I allow the youngest girl to be influenced by the dark side in exchange for me getting to recruit our 2nd boy. I'm pretty confident but will consider contacting Nate James if her brother tries to influence him.

This may be sacreligious, but I always thought Dante Calabria was cute, too. Also, I would advise getting your "deal" in writing and signed before witnesses. You may want a lawyer to go over it with you. Don't want anything getting by in the fine print!


Great thread!
Mine is a Duke household, absolutely. Both Blue Devils, with a daughter Devil.
To you folks married to someone outside the clan, Hanky Panky makes some adorable ladies panties in Royal Blue, lacy, sexy, one size fits all (expensive but worth every penny) so next time your beloved starts bellyaching about your game duties, either be the spouse that purchases the panties for the wife or the wife that slips them on to model for the spouse. (I would say husband but geez, it's all good!)
We can all get along during hoops season! ;):cool:

Weezie's new radio show...."Duke in the Bedroom!"


I love this thread too. I am not married, but any woman I've ever met with any sort of romantic possibilities gets informed of my Duke obsession within about 10 minutes (even if it's July). Every girlfriend I have had in the past decade-plus understands that, with regard to scheduling time together during the season, there are two choices:
1. You may watch the Duke game with me, and you will root for Duke.
2. I will see you tomorrow.

Awareness of my Duke obsession extends even beyond romantic relationships. Monday night, I was at a committee meeting at church, and we were trying to schedule a planning session. The pervasive number 1 choice was to do it this coming Sunday after church. I winced audibly, and more than one person said, "Oh...basketball, right?" I responded, "Well, I hope so."
My entire family is Duke-obsessed. I watch a lot of the games with my mother or father (he was T '70). The first things I remember watching on television in my life are Duke games. Everyone who knows our family understands that this is just part of the deal with us. Mom and I are this way about the Braves too.

Oh, and our dogs also hide during big games.

I'm using this as a rule of thumb for anyone I meet. Of course, I've also considered drawing up a short application with the first question being....Duke or UNC? Your choice will determine if I read the rest of this application or not...lol

BlueDGal
03-09-2011, 07:37 PM
i am the spousal unit and i'm as obsessed as he is....maybe even more so!!

dukee94
03-09-2011, 07:42 PM
My wife and I met camping out for the Duke/Michigan championship game rematch in Dec '92. She was in tent 1, I was in tent 2. We were married in the Duke Chapel, but now really wish we could have used Cameron. We live in California, but still have season tickets and typically make it back for about half the home games. That probably says it all.

BLUE_DEVIL96
03-09-2011, 08:36 PM
Im 14 and my girlfriend get its.she is a die had duke fan.;) woohoo
we watch all the duke games together.scream cuss eat. i think this one is a keeper.haha lol
but my problem is my parents they just think im crazy like at halftime of the unc game i got sent up to my room for saying ryan kelly needs to hit those shots dammit, crazy right.
go devils

Johnboy
03-09-2011, 09:04 PM
Understand? No, but she at least puts up with it mostly.

+1, but I doubt you married a Tar Heel like I did. I have raised our sons right, though, and they are both rabid Duke fans. The other night was hell for me, as I watched the Devils lose the ACC Regular Season title in a room full of Heels (and one Wolfpack sympathizer who was at least not rooting for the baby blues).

basket1544
03-09-2011, 09:26 PM
+1, but I doubt you married a Tar Heel like I did. I have raised our sons right, though, and they are both rabid Duke fans. The other night was hell for me, as I watched the Devils lose the ACC Regular Season title in a room full of Heels (and one Wolfpack sympathizer who was at least not rooting for the baby blues).

My brother and I sat side by side Sat during the game cheering on opposite teams. He had on his UNC blues and I had on my Duke blues. Mom was going to take a picture but then the game started and she got so upset that Dad declared she couldn't hold electronic devices. (We were all worried the camera would end up inside the TV.)

mapei
03-09-2011, 09:36 PM
My spousal unit went to Duke and comes from a basketball family, so this is not a problem in the least.

Atldukie79
03-09-2011, 10:00 PM
As a life long Duke fan and native of Durham, I was delighted to meet my spousal unit at Duke. I introduced her to the delights of Duke basketball (heck....I introduced her to basketball). However, it must be stated that a rather emphatic statement had to be made to establish the importance of Duke hoops to her parents...

When visiting my wife to be as a senior in college at her parents home, and while trying to impress her family...I discovered that her Mom had committed us to go see a neighbor kid deliver a speech at an Eagle Scout competition at a Holiday Inn meeting room. How excited i was to learn that this coincided with the TV broadcast of the Duke/UNC game. This was in the late 1970s...and such a broadcast was quite rare...and no recording devices were available...

No problem...I promptly unplugged the 60 pound, non-portable TV set from their living room, carted it the the meeting facility, plugged it into a wall socket, set the rabbit ears, and sat cross legged on the carpet and watched the game as several hundred Scouts and families walked around me to the event. Providence smiled and the 5 minute speech I had to watch was delivered at halftime.

I am not sure my in-laws have looked at me the same way after 29 years...but I never again had to explain my absence during basketball season:)

Dr. Tina
03-09-2011, 10:00 PM
I'm regularly tortured by a UNC loving coworker. Her husband is a Duke fan. However, she has somehow brainwashed all 5 of their children, so that they all like UNC. I feel so sorry for her husband.

This same coworker, by the way, got into a sparring session with me this past weekend because UNC won and she believes it makes them ACC Conference Champions. I posted the ACC bylaws that clearly show the ACC Tournament Champ is the true conference champion, and that the media routinely gets it wrong, but she'd rather believe headlines over, you know, actual facts. Ignorance is bliss when you're a Tarhole....lol

wilson
03-09-2011, 10:04 PM
I'm regularly tortured by a UNC loving coworker. Her husband is a Duke fan. However, she has somehow brainwashed all 5 of their children, so that they all like UNC. I feel so sorry for her husband. Rather than feeling sorry for him, I am disappointed in him. What the heck has he been doing? To borrow a phrase from the young'uns, "epic fail."

Dr. Tina
03-09-2011, 10:08 PM
Rather than feeling sorry for him, I am disappointed in him. What the heck has he been doing? To borrow a phrase from the young'uns, "epic fail."

Well, I think part of it is that he suffered a stroke awhile back, and so maybe that makes it harder for him. I can't be sure.

wilson
03-09-2011, 10:09 PM
Well, I think part of it is that he suffered a stroke awhile back, and so maybe that makes it harder for him. I can't be sure....and now I feel terrible. No insensitivity intended.

Dr. Tina
03-09-2011, 10:16 PM
...and now I feel terrible. No insensitivity intended.

No problem. It's not like you had that knowledge. Their nephew goes to Duke, though - he was accepted into some PhD program there. Of course, I've been told he dates a Tarhole fan. It's just not right.

At my workplace, I wear my Duke stuff on game days and such. Everyone knows I'm Duke's #1 fan, but I behave with class. When I could gloat about Duke beating UNC, I usually play it cool. The UNC coworker has to say something nearly every time she sees me. So, she comes off as way more obnoxious than I could ever be...lol

dukelilsis
03-09-2011, 10:20 PM
I was born into a Duke loving family that always planned life around the basketball schedule. My husband is a Wake and tarhole fan. Of course, he's not a true, die hard fan or I would've never dated him--much less married him. He most definitely does not understand. This became painfully apparent one of our first years of marriage when he bought tickets to a hockey game on the same night a Duke game was on TV. I take vacation days on the first two days of the NCAA each year. Last year, my husband planned for us to leave on vacation on the day of the NCAA finals. After realizing that I would be loud enough to get us thrown out of our hotel, he agreed to wait and leave the next day. He refuses to watch Duke/unc games with me because hea finds my behavior ridiculous. He understands my hatred of all things tarhole just as unreasonable as my love of Duke.
Oh well, he's survived 11 years so I guess he's learned to put up with it. If we ever have kids, I'll divorce him if he even thinks about buying our child anything resembling light blue.

OZZIE4DUKE
03-09-2011, 10:22 PM
My wife and I met camping out for the Duke/Michigan championship game rematch in Dec '92. She was in tent 1, I was in tent 2. We were married in the Duke Chapel, but now really wish we could have used Cameron. We live in California, but still have season tickets and typically make it back for about half the home games. That probably says it all.
That's a LOT of frequent flier miles! Good for you!

Dr. Tina
03-09-2011, 10:22 PM
I was born into a Duke loving family that always planned life around the basketball schedule. My husband is a Wake and tarhole fan. Of course, he's not a true, die hard fan or I would've never dated him--much less married him. He most definitely does not understand. This became painfully apparent one of our first years of marriage when he bought tickets to a hockey game on the same night a Duke game was on TV. I take vacation days on the first two days of the NCAA each year. Last year, my husband planned for us to leave on vacation on the day of the NCAA finals. After realizing that I would be loud enough to get us thrown out of our hotel, he agreed to wait and leave the next day. He refuses to watch Duke/unc games with me because hea finds my behavior ridiculous. He understands my hatred of all things tarhole just as unreasonable as my love of Duke.
Oh well, he's survived 11 years so I guess he's learned to put up with it. If we ever have kids, I'll divorce him if he even thinks about buying our child anything resembling light blue.

I have personal days I could use next week for the 1st 2 rounds. Of course, EVERYONE would know what I was really up to....lolololol

wilson
03-09-2011, 10:27 PM
I have personal days I could use next week for the 1st 2 rounds. Of course, EVERYONE would know what I was really up to....lololololIn 1990, when I was in 2nd grade, Duke played the first two rounds of the tournament in Atlanta, in the old Omni. My dad checked my brother and me out of school to go to the first game, on Friday afternoon, and told the people in the office that we had a dentist appointment.
We got to the Omni, and our dentist was sitting five rows behind us.
Oops.

I also missed a day and a half of school all four years of high school for a "college visit"...that is, a visit to nine colleges, who were competing against each other in the ACC Tournament.

None of the above was a secret to anyone who knew anything about our family.

Dr. Tina
03-09-2011, 10:34 PM
In 1990, when I was in 2nd grade, Duke played the first two rounds of the tournament in Atlanta, in the old Omni. My dad checked my brother and me out of school to go to the first game, on Friday afternoon, and told the people in the office that we had a dentist appointment.
We got to the Omni, and our dentist was sitting five rows behind us.
Oops.

I also missed a day and a half of school all four years of high school for a "college visit"...that is, a visit to nine colleges, who were competing against each other in the ACC Tournament.

None of the above was a secret to anyone who knew anything about our family.

I really like your family's priorities! Sound like good people.. :D

DukeGirl4ever
03-10-2011, 07:28 AM
I have personal days I could use next week for the 1st 2 rounds. Of course, EVERYONE would know what I was really up to....lolololol

Last year I had to have my gallbladder removed. Guess when I planned for the surgery....:p

This year I scheduled lab tests to be done in the morning. I will continue to take sick days on those days (and make dr. appointments) until my workplace requires a doctor's note for our absences.

Lid
03-10-2011, 09:27 AM
We got to the Omni, and our dentist was sitting five rows behind us.
Oops.Ha - love this!



I also missed a day and a half of school all four years of high school for a "college visit"...that is, a visit to nine colleges, who were competing against each other in the ACC Tournament.

And this helps assuage the (admittedly small amount of) guilt I was feeling over the date my husband has with my daughter for the tournament today, and that I'll have with my son tomorrow.

DownEastDevil
03-10-2011, 09:37 AM
My wife arranged a surprise party for me on my 50th birthday. She did such a good job of keeping it quiet I thought it would be great to spend my birthday watching Duke play in Cameron. When I told her about the tickets she never blinked an eye and said that was great. She never told me any different until I found out from a friend a week later at my re-scheduled surprise party. My friend told me how much she had to go thru to get in touch with everyone the last minute to get it re-scheduled. Now that's what you call understanding the DUKE obsession.

TonyWR
03-10-2011, 10:58 AM
I'm regularly tortured by a UNC loving coworker. Her husband is a Duke fan. However, she has somehow brainwashed all 5 of their children, so that they all like UNC. I feel so sorry for her husband.

This same coworker, by the way, got into a sparring session with me this past weekend because UNC won and she believes it makes them ACC Conference Champions. I posted the ACC bylaws that clearly show the ACC Tournament Champ is the true conference champion, and that the media routinely gets it wrong, but she'd rather believe headlines over, you know, actual facts. Ignorance is bliss when you're a Tarhole....lol

Tina,

I feel your pain, I work with a few tarholes as well. If the holes win that's all you hear but when they lose you can't find them. That's typical of their fanbase. I can't tell you the times I get harassed out in public for being a Duke fan. I live in western N.C. and I represent my school by wearing my Duke attire with pride. I can't go into a Home Depot here without the typical brainiac hole fan asking "Duke?" in a higher than necessary voice. I held the door for a mother at Party City not long ago, she had her hands full of ballons and birthday stuff but she couldn't help but throw a jab on the way out "oh thanks but go change your shirt". I handle it with class and never back down but it is tiring to say the least. Usually the best way to handle a mouthy tarhole is to just look at them and think to yourself "poor little thing" as you would a child. Some are hard to overlook, I've had a 'debate' with a few of them. I was in a local store with my basic math shirt on and a hole fan stopped mid aisle and said "Uh, splain yer shurt to me" so I looked at him and said "you must be a unc fan if I have to explain basic math to you", that ended the conversation.

Our work is never done, lol.

GO DUKE!!!!!!

DevilWearsPrada
03-10-2011, 11:30 AM
I have loved reading these stories!

I was blessed to have been raised in a Duke family. We went to Duke Football and Basketball games together. We would always listen to Duke radio. My Dad taught me to listen to Duke Radio, while watching a game on TV.

With the former spouse, he understood my Duke obsession and supported that. Otherwise, he would have been the outcast with myself and Mom and Dad. I bought him his first Duke teeshirt and sweatshirt. I was married to him when he won both 91 and 92 championships. So Duke was rolling!

However, I dated a couple of Unc fans, and I launched them! I have not made that mistake since.

Love the stories! I read every story on this thread! Lets Go Duke!

ThePublisher
03-10-2011, 12:26 PM
I read DBR a lot. Almost every article. I look through the forums quite a bit. Probably more than healthy. So I talk about Duke, a lot. My 'spousal unit' has grown to like the Blue Devils a lot as well. She gets into the games and calls things. Shes learned when fouls are good calls and when they aren't. Says, 'pass it to Curry, he is on fire' (from recent unc debacle). I'm very proud. Haha.

flyingdutchdevil
03-10-2011, 12:45 PM
Been with the lady for nearly 8 years. Met in high school, started dating during prom (cliched, I know. But they are cliches for a reason), both attended Duke, been dating for 4 years after graduation. Will both be attending a Duke grad school next year. Basically, Duke blue in and Duke blue out.

That said, she cannot understand my affinity and love for Duke basketball. She understands the ACC games, the Big Ten-ACC, the ACC Tournament, and, of course, the NCAA Tournament. But she doesn't at all understand the recruiting, the tune-up games, the Duke NBA players, and especially DBR. She knows I enjoy this forum so she doesn't mind me going on it, but she gets incredibly frustrated come ACC Tourny and NCAA Tourny time when I'm on the internet 24/7 reading up on our Blue Devils.

Basically, despite both having gone to Duke and both liking Duke basketball (understatement on my end), my simply answer to this thread is 'No' - my future spousal unit does not understand my Duke obsession. Just like I don't understand her obsession with cute sweaters.

Benjonson
03-10-2011, 12:59 PM
My spouse of 30 years graduated from the University of Chicago, "where fun goes to wither away", and took education very seriously. Sports of all sorts were utterly foreign to her. So, when any sports event is on, she simply doesn't register. Having said that, she has begun to watch Final Four action when Duke is playing. However, "watch" is a relative term....but she knew what was going on during the last few seconds of the Butler game, and celebrated appropriately. So those Maroon spots have changed somewhat. However, the crowning achievement/conversion has been her use of 4191 as a hotel safe combination. She proudly told me when I was stumped..."why, that is the date of Duke's first national championship." That's the U of C education for you.

UrinalCake
03-10-2011, 02:44 PM
My wife and I have gone without a TV for a couple years now, for the sake of having more family time and keeping our young kids away from media as much as possible. She knows how hard it is for me come basketball season. So this year for my birthday she rented a big-screen TV and got cable for a month in March so that I can watch all the action. Gotta love her! Having a birthday in March, most of my birthday presents are somehow basketball-related.

Rogue
03-10-2011, 03:24 PM
My spouse unit learned early I was a DUKE fan, and never had a problem with it. THE SHOT of 1991 cemented the thought early for he. She will verbally pull for DUKE, but doesn't sit and watch a game. She's only been to one game in Cameron. She thought it was very "entertaining". When I get tickets now,, she's not the one invited lol.


Now my daughter is where the problem is. We graduated from unc-ch. She went to Peace College the first two years. When it came time for paying at unc-ch, I told her it was time she learned to manage money. Put money in her checking account ( yeah, back in the day, we use to write these things called checks lol ) and she would pay for her tution, rent etc.. She lives in the town unc-ch is located. So on game day. We don't communicate. She's a poor loser, and lets face it, over the last 20 plus years, DUKE has really owned the holes. She doesn't call me after football games either.:cool:

Dr. Tina
03-10-2011, 07:51 PM
Tina,

I feel your pain, I work with a few tarholes as well. If the holes win that's all you hear but when they lose you can't find them. That's typical of their fanbase. I can't tell you the times I get harassed out in public for being a Duke fan. I live in western N.C. and I represent my school by wearing my Duke attire with pride. I can't go into a Home Depot here without the typical brainiac hole fan asking "Duke?" in a higher than necessary voice. I held the door for a mother at Party City not long ago, she had her hands full of ballons and birthday stuff but she couldn't help but throw a jab on the way out "oh thanks but go change your shirt". I handle it with class and never back down but it is tiring to say the least. Usually the best way to handle a mouthy tarhole is to just look at them and think to yourself "poor little thing" as you would a child. Some are hard to overlook, I've had a 'debate' with a few of them. I was in a local store with my basic math shirt on and a hole fan stopped mid aisle and said "Uh, splain yer shurt to me" so I looked at him and said "you must be a unc fan if I have to explain basic math to you", that ended the conversation.

Our work is never done, lol.

GO DUKE!!!!!!

Truer words have never been spoken!

My brother also claims to be a Tarheel fan, not that he knows much about them until he decides to pay attention in that small window between the NFL and MLB seasons. I often know WAY MORE about his team than he ever does. He has 3 children. The youngest 2 "root" for UNC, but they really don't know anything about UNC either - they like them because their Dad does. When I went to Duke in December, I bought the kids Duke shirt for Christmas...hahaha!

My uncle also likes UNC and is a master of puns. So, I was subjected to pun after UNC pun last night for about 10 minutes, with a few Duke ones thrown in for good measure. I remember one holiday where he literally followed me around a family member's home to espouse the superior play of the Tarholes. It was all I could do not to pop him!

Part of the problem with the UNC fans around here is that I'm from the Binghamton area, which was home to King Rice. I work with people who went to school with King Rice, who coach or are related to people who coached King Rice (ie. the coworker), etc. etc. So, A LOT of the love simply comes from "one of their own" having donned a baby blue uniform.

BTW, I sent my UNC friend a link to Al Featherston's great article on the ACC tournament to educate her. She responded by questioning our "Blue Devil" nickname, so, naturally, I had to educate her on THAT, too.....LOL!

77devil
03-10-2011, 08:11 PM
That's exactly how I feel. When I went to Greensboro for Rounds 1 and 2 of the NCAA Tournament, both Duke and UNC were playing there. I saw many Duke and UNC fans married to each other or related. It all just feels so dirty to me! I won't stand for having my house divided.

My extended family on my mother's side essentially is a house divided split fairly evenly between Duke and UNC grads. Needless to say, the occasional large gatherings are lively, particularly if during basketball season.

Dr. Tina
03-10-2011, 08:20 PM
My extended family on my mother's side essentially is a house divided split fairly evenly between Duke and UNC grads. Needless to say, the occasional large gatherings are lively, particularly if during basketball season.

Most of my extended family isn't really into basketball, so I don't hear anything too much. It's usually the non-relatives and some friends who have issues.

JMarley50
03-10-2011, 10:04 PM
Its been enjoyable reading through this thread. I am also in the lucky category in that my wife is just as hardcore as I am. We both agree that we wouldn't have gotten married if we weren't Duke fans. In fact it was even incorporated into our wedding!

1892

BleedsP287
03-10-2011, 11:22 PM
I met my wife in college at UVA and we went to Duke together right after getting married. My first and second years of grad school we danced around the bonfires together in 1991 and 1992. She gets it. God love her.

Bluedevil114
03-11-2011, 12:06 AM
I am 37 years old and have been rooting for Duke since I was 6 years old. My older brother was 14 years old and sat me down and made me a Duke fan when I was six. I went to DeMatha High School (Danny Ferry and Kenny Blakeney) I was in study hall with Kenny when he was a senior and I was a freshman. I met my current wife in 1995 obviously three years from our first two National Championships. I can swear that I have not missed a dribble of Duke Basketball since meeting her. I have bought the full court package with ESPN because one of their games were not televised. I graduated from Maryland and would sleep in Cole Field House for my student ticket to the Duke game and sit in the student section with all my Duke gear on. I would go to class everyday with my Duke gear on and could not care less. I go to all games at Maryland, Georgetown and Virginia. I also take my two boys down to a game every year. My favorite game to date in the gone in sixty seconds game at Cole Field House.

My house in covered in pictures of Duke players/moments and my closet is basically full of Duke gear. I have a tattoo of the Devil on my arm and have never taken my Devil necklace off in over 15 years. She married a Devil for life and knew it from the start. I go on this website three or four times a day along with Dukeupdate.com. Her birthday is April 2nd. Duke played Arizona in 2001 on her birthday. She went out with her parents and I had a bunch of guys over for the game. I have missed things with my kids and important things with her because Duke was playing. My life revolves around Duke all year long. Of course she understands right?

Wrong!!! She still does not get it but I honestly do not care. Thank god I do not have to choose.

Go Duke!!