Your worst present ever!!!

[DukeBlueNV]

I thought this would be a fun idea for a thread...

Anyone got a good story? Lets hear it...

[Reddevil]

In 1972, my grandmother new that her eight year old grandson was a football fan, so she bought him a football jersey for Christmas. It was a Franco Harris jersey. I was/am a Raiders fan. The immaculate reception occurred December 23, 1972.

[BlueDevilBaby]

Ding, ding, ding. No need for anyone else to reply. I can't imagine anything worse for a 12-year old kid.

[kexman]

This doesn't really qualify as worse present...but funny none the less. I was really little at the time and we were having christmas at my grandparents. I had opened several nice presents from different family members. I received a card from my great grand mother that had a $2 bill in it. I whispered to one of my parents that Nanny must be rich. They asked why...and I replied that she gave money as a present. Some thought it was funny...some thought that they had wasted tons of money on christmas presents when I was most impressed by a $2 bill!!!

[DukieInKansas]

In 1972, my grandmother new that her eight year old grandson was a football fan, so she bought him a football jersey for Christmas. It was a Franco Harris jersey. I was/am a Raiders fan. The immaculate reception occurred December 23, 1972.

Being a Steeler fan, I think your grandmother was/is a very wise and wonderful woman.

Even though I'm a Steeler/Chief fan, I do feel bad for your 12 year old self.

[weezie]

Not my worst, but my kids were always less than thrilled by the same gift for years from their uncle and aunt (on HUSBAND'S SIDE): one pair of black socks for the son, one pair of white socks for the daughter. And these folks were/are loaded with dough.
Super not cool.

[SoCalDukeFan]

I read that one year Gilbert Arenas' team had a secret Santa, you know each player got a name of another player and had to get him a gift.

Gilbert's gift was a Gilbert Arenas highlight reel.

SoCal

[rthomas]

Being a Steeler fan, I think your grandmother was/is a very wise and wonderful woman.


I would pay good money for a 1972 Franco Harris jersey.

[Reddevil]

I would pay good money for a 1972 Franco Harris jersey.

Yeah, I gave it to a friend who was a Pittsburgh fan. Looking back, it was Harris' rookie year so of all the jerseys out there, how did THAT one get chosen? Why was it even available? She lived in upstate NY, and Franco was a big deal at Penn St. so I guess in that neck of the woods they had them. He had a following called Franco's Italian Army, so I guess his jersey was worth making around those parts.

A few years later in 1975 she got me a Fran Tarkenton jersey for Christmas (the Vikes were my favorite NFC team). Of course three days later Staubach threw an answered prayer to Drew Pearson in the playoffs to beat them. Oh well, at least the next SB was Oakland vs Minnesota, but what a rocky ride.

[ArnieMc]

For Christmas, my aunt gave me a soap-on-a-rope with a pirates face on it. I thanked her, but she detected my insincerity. She said, "Why don't you like that? You've never seen anything like that before." I went to my room and got the two pirate soap-on-a-ropes she had given me the previous two years and showed them to her. She never gave me another present. :)

[AtlBluRew]

For Christmas, my aunt gave me a soap-on-a-rope with a pirates face on it. I thanked her, but she detected my insincerity. She said, "Why don't you like that? You've never seen anything like that before." I went to my room and got the two pirate soap-on-a-ropes she had given me the previous two years and showed them to her. She never gave me another present. :)

We must have the same aunt. On my father's side, the family always gathered at my uncle and aunt's house to exchange gifts on Christmas Day. I remember one of my teen years, that uncle and aunt gave me Brut soap on a rope. I "accidentally" left it at their house. The next year, my gift was Brut soap on a rope ... and I think it was the very same bar as the previous year.

Talk about "re-gifting!"

[pacificrounder]

My Aunt on my father's side gives the worst presents. Me and my sister have a good laugh every year about where she'll buy our gifts, because every single one ends up getting returned for store credit. We love it when she buys things at Nordstroms, because they'll give you a cash refund. :D

Worst gift to me was probably a shaving kit back when I didn't even have peach fuzz. One year, she gave my sister a remarkably ugly and tacky American flag pin and followed it up the next year with a designer make-up kit (my sister doesn't really wear makeup). The gifts aren't awful standing alone, but in the context of who me and my sister are and our interest, they are totally off the reservation.

But bless her heart, she keeps trying. I wonder what it'll be this year...

[davekay1971]

In 1982 (I think), my brother and I were clamoring for an Apple IIe computer. My father kept telling us we would be receiving a new lawnmower for Christmas so we could mow lawns in the spring/summer and earn money to buy our Apple IIe. Ha ha, Dad, very funny. No, sons, I'm not joking. Whatever, Dad. We knew our mother would not allow him to be so cruel, and that we were going to be getting an Apple IIe for Christmas.

On Christmas morning, a great big box was wrapped up by the tree with a tag, for William and David, love Mom and Dad. Merry Christmas indeed! The box was the right size for a brand spanking new Apple IIe complete with keyboard, monitor and, hope hope hope, TWO whole floppy drives! Yeah baby, perfect for some Wizardry 2! We ignored all other gifts and tore into the wrapping paper. Tearing it off, we saw the box, a box for a brand new lawnmower.

Ha ha, Dad, we know there's a computer inside. Good one!

Nope...that box opened to reveal a lawnmower.

(to be fair to the old man, the Apple IIe arrived via shipping a few days later...but my grandmother never really forgave him for the heartbroken looks on our little faces)

Close second: My Aunt Pat, who sent me "Where The Red Fern Grows" for Christmas when I was about 11 or 12. Great book to curl up with by the fire on a cold Christmas day...until the DOG DIES IN THE END!

[BlueDevilBaby]

Close second: My Aunt Pat, who sent me "Where The Red Fern Grows" for Christmas when I was about 11 or 12. Great book to curl up with by the fire on a cold Christmas day...until the DOG DIES IN THE END!

Thanks, I never read that one!

[hurleyfor3]

In 1982 (I think), my brother and I were clamoring for an Apple IIe computer. My father kept telling us we would be receiving a new lawnmower for Christmas so we could mow lawns in the spring/summer and earn money to buy our Apple IIe. Ha ha, Dad, very funny. No, sons, I'm not joking. Whatever, Dad. We knew our mother would not allow him to be so cruel, and that we were going to be getting an Apple IIe for Christmas.

I hope you got him The Lawnmower Man on dvd at some point.

Anyway, you think that's bad. Dad got us an Apple computer for xmas one year. Except instead of the ][+, he decided to splurge... for a state of the art... wait for it... Apple ///.

As Apple historians will recall, the ][ emulation mode was intentionally crippled on the ///, which was one of the reasons the /// failed so badly. For example, you couldn't use joysticks.

He ended up taking it to the office and using it for work. At least you could still run VisiCalc on it.

[weezie]

Thanks, I never read that one!

:D:D:D
Ah, Christmas magic! l-o-l

[dukestheheat]

For Christmas, my aunt gave me a soap-on-a-rope with a pirates face on it. I thanked her, but she detected my insincerity. She said, "Why don't you like that? You've never seen anything like that before." I went to my room and got the two pirate soap-on-a-ropes she had given me the previous two years and showed them to her. She never gave me another present. :)

.....gave me, last year, a BROKEN Christmas tree ornament of the Duke Blue Devil. She knew the darned thing was broken but she wrapped it up anyway. She does stuff like that all the time. She is one cheap aunt. She wraps up broken, dilapidated stuff and gives it away for Christmas.

In fact, ALL I GOT for Christmas this year was this: a pack on pens, and set of replaceable erasers, and a journal. That was IT. I sat flabbergasted by the tree as 3 million dollars in presents went to the two smaller Dukies in the family, and my wife.

dukestheheat.

[weezie]

See you and raise:

After dragging my dear nuclear family to visit my in-laws in a dark corner of hell known as Shrevepatch, LA, I was joyfully entertained by the site of the more favored adult children being given checks for $1K for their travels while we, the ones who traveled the farthest, slogged through airports, dragged in good wines (unlike the boxed wine rotgut the other siblings supplied), WE were tossed some stained old napkins and a ratty tablecloth the grandparents were trying to unload before they move.

As the saying goes, "It's the thought that counts!"

[DukieInKansas]

.....gave me, last year, a BROKEN Christmas tree ornament of the Duke Blue Devil. She knew the darned thing was broken but she wrapped it up anyway. She does stuff like that all the time. She is one cheap aunt. She wraps up broken, dilapidated stuff and gives it away for Christmas.

In fact, ALL I GOT for Christmas this year was this: a pack on pens, and set of replaceable erasers, and a journal. That was IT. I sat flabbergasted by the tree as 3 million dollars in presents went to the two smaller Dukies in the family, and my wife.

dukestheheat.


See you and raise:

After dragging my dear nuclear family to visit my in-laws in a dark corner of hell known as Shrevepatch, LA, I was joyfully entertained by the site of the more favored adult children being given checks for $1K for their travels while we, the ones who traveled the farthest, slogged through airports, dragged in good wines (unlike the boxed wine rotgut the other siblings supplied), WE were tossed some stained old napkins and a ratty tablecloth the grandparents were trying to unload before they move.

As the saying goes, "It's the thought that counts!"

You can come visit me. I promise you will get something nice - even if it is just a good bottle of wine. :D

[sue71, esq]

See you and raise:

After dragging my dear nuclear family to visit my in-laws in a dark corner of hell known as Shrevepatch, LA, I was joyfully entertained by the site of the more favored adult children being given checks for $1K for their travels while we, the ones who traveled the farthest, slogged through airports, dragged in good wines (unlike the boxed wine rotgut the other siblings supplied), WE were tossed some stained old napkins and a ratty tablecloth the grandparents were trying to unload before they move.

As the saying goes, "It's the thought that counts!"

A penny for YOUR thoughts about it. ;)

[DevilWearsPrada]

.....gave me, last year, a BROKEN Christmas tree ornament of the Duke Blue Devil. She knew the darned thing was broken but she wrapped it up anyway. She does stuff like that all the time. She is one cheap aunt. She wraps up broken, dilapidated stuff and gives it away for Christmas.

In fact, ALL I GOT for Christmas this year was this: a pack on pens, and set of replaceable erasers, and a journal. That was IT. I sat flabbergasted by the tree as 3 million dollars in presents went to the two smaller Dukies in the family, and my wife.

dukestheheat.

Perhaps, as the 3 million dollars in presents were being distributed to the 2 smaller Dukies in the family and your wife.......... they would share the wealth.

[DevilWearsPrada]

I remember several. But in middle school, exchanging gifts with some of my girlfriends. I received a box of Peach scented (it smelled nasty) stationery. We had to write letters and mail them..... No email or internet, in those days. Pack of 10 envelopes and 20 sheets of matching letterhead. Had peaches on the stationery and didnt smell at all, like sweet peaches.

The same year, another little exchange of gifts: received some cheap, probably 2 for a $1..... little vials of supposedily perfume. (Smelt more like "HOT AFTERNOON ON A GOAT FARM",,,,, rather than, whatever it was called.

My Mother, told me to throw out that vial of perfume, she didnt want her 12 year old daughter smelling like a "French W**** Ho". Mama didn't say Ho. I didn't know what a French W, was....... and still don't, to this day. However, I knew I didnt want to smell like one.

I think Santa brought me a bottle of cologne or Eau de Toilette of one of the Estee Lauder fragrances, and probably Chanel. I would always wear my Mother's perfume or cologne, and Santa would bring me a bottle or 2, every Christmas. I would still sneek into Mother's vanity, and spray another fragrance, she had. She always smelled good with her Fragrances! (Things you remember as a child)! Gosh, I miss my Mama and Daddy. Great memories, and so many of them!!!

[dukestheheat]

Perhaps, as the 3 million dollars in presents were being distributed to the 2 smaller Dukies in the family and your wife.......... they would share the wealth.

......PLEEEEEEEEEEEASE don't get me rolling on that 'sharing the wealth' stuff. Please! Must resist urge to dive in, must resist urge, must.....

dth.

[meloveduke]

My mom seems to not know that I am a Duke fan. For 3 years back to back see would get get me some kind of unc gear. She would alway ask me when she saw the look on my face, "Its unc do you like it?'. me: "hell no!" then everyone there leans to her and says, " He hates unc and is a duke fan". This all stopped a few years ago when my aunt (her sister) asked her what three colors should se use to make me a felt blanket for christmas. Wouldnt you know that on christmas morning I opened a hand made Carolina colored blanket. I felt bad for my aunt. She saw the look on my face and asked what was wrong with it. So I told her, she turned to my mom and started flipping "I told you he was a Duke fan and not a carolina fan". I guess she learned her leason cause she stopped giving me sports gear.

[mickeysgotagun]

Last year my girlfriend gave me a copy of the movie that we saw on our first date. While I appreciated the thought, the copy was in a blu-ray format and I have no blue ray player. She said she bought that version because the best buy clerk told it was the best quality. :p

[dukebluelemur]

I got a handmade wooden candlestick from my grandmother one year. Square sides, rough edges, very 'middle school shop class' or maybe a kit you would get at a craft store. Hand painted. Red. With stenciled white hearts. Clearly this was a recycled mothers day gift from one of the grand-kids. Hideous.

I'm not sure why, even if she was just giving junk from her pile of junk, that this jumped out as a good gift for a 24 year old young man.

[aimo]

Geez, you folks are making me feel better and better about my family! Thanks!

[aimo]

Thanks, I never read that one!

Doesn't the dog ALWAYS die in the end?

[davekay1971]

I got a handmade wooden candlestick from my grandmother one year. Square sides, rough edges, very 'middle school shop class' or maybe a kit you would get at a craft store. Hand painted. Red. With stenciled white hearts. Clearly this was a recycled mothers day gift from one of the grand-kids. Hideous.

I'm not sure why, even if she was just giving junk from her pile of junk, that this jumped out as a good gift for a 24 year old young man.

I just love the idea of a painted wooden holder of fire. Better check and see if your mom took out a big life insurance policy on you...