There's a post spreading around various Big 12 blogs and boards called "If the Big XII teams were countries" (one such iteration:

Inspired by this, a UNC grad in the office and I decided to take a run at classifying the ACC:

UNC: USA - Has been successful and is perhaps the best endowed country of them all, but its inability reign in its ego and its internal blunders have prevented it from being seen as a successful leader by the rest of the world.

Duke: England - Most of the world hates it solely for having been successful. Its wealth and the level of influence it carries far outweigh its size. The only thing no one is jealous of is the female population.

State: India - Overcrowded. Lots of engineers doing low-quality work.

Clemson: Mexico - Pretty big, but not that productive. Would be nothing without its neighbors to the north.

FSU: Russia - One-time superpower will now resort to anything to try to compete.

BC: Canada - Fierce inferiority complex stemming from its inability to compete with its direct neighbors. Good at hockey. Hasn't figured out that no one else cares about hockey.

Miami: Italy - Gorgeous location with better looking women. Accomplishments driven by men of violence. Glory on the field may be behind it, but you should never count it out and you always want to be invited to its party.

Maryland: Argentina - Has the resources to be successful, and has shown flashes of mild success, but because of internal instability will never have a prolonged presence at the top.

Va Tech: Pakistan - Mountainous and in the middle of nowhere. Lots of violence. New to the big leagues and hasn't quite figured out how to handle that.

Virginia: France - Has all the tools to be successful, but has no sense of its place in the world. Sure, it can claim some modest accomplishments, but its consistent failures make everyone else view it as a joke.

Georgia Tech: Japan - Good at engineering and dominated by an all work and no play mentality, but as a result decently productive in the world. Strange fetishes resulting from lack of females.

Wake Forest: Monaco - Small, pretty, rich. Don't worry about them -- they're not going to bother you.